M41
Is chivalry dead?
October 15 2012
Comments
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RHP User
13 years ago
Give me a real man anyday! A man that opens the door for me...that will pay for meals...That will throw his coat over a puddle so I can walk over it without getting my shoes wet! Love it all! I have taught my children to always stand up for people older than them on public transport and to allow older people to walk in a door before them as they hold it open and have taught my sons to always be chivalrous! My daughter gets funny looks when she helps elderly people on a bus or train or stands up for them to sit down as she is tattooed and has many piercings! In the end it is how we bring our children up to be respectful of others! Hugs...xFunlovingx
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RHP User
13 years ago
about much more than opening doors. It's an attitude of generosity, courtesy, consideration and manners, and it shines through in the way a chivalrous man treats women, other men, elderly people, children ... everyone, basically. I have a deep dislike for small-mindedness, pettiness, selfishness and a lack of courtesy. As a result, chivalry rates very, very highly on my list. And if a man goes to the trouble of opening a door for me, he'll receive my genuine appreciation.
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RHP User
13 years ago
she said what Im thinking.......again !!! May treu chilvary never die...
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RHP User
13 years ago
I always open the door for men. Especially when its time to go, as I would hate for them to smack into the door as they run for their lives after Sex. not a problem, but then I am an old fashioned girl love Lady Tuscan red of the " Knight of the Garter..and stockings"
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RHP User
13 years ago
I completely agree with brave_heart. Chivalry isn't dead and I agree, it is an attitude. Being a good guy shouldn't be hard and sometimes Chivalry is just plain good manners.
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playful4u
13 years ago
Most of the time I remember to be chivalrous, but a soon as I forget I seem to cop it. Does this sound familiar? These are the times we live in where men are required to show chivalry whilst also respecting equality. Now where is my glass of Chivas, "Honey, pour me another one, that's a good girl", lol
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RHP User
13 years ago
I believe in opening doors, paying for meals, wearing nice clothes and looking my best...I guess I just love spoiling a woman...*smiles in an angelically devilish way*
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RHP User
13 years ago
I was always taught to open the car door for a lady. Same goes for walking through a doorway, ladies first. When I go out with a lady, I always insist on paying ( I've actually gotten in trouble for this a few time recently, because the lady thought it was rude). It's how I was brought up. To me, these things are as important as covering your mouth when you yawn or sneeze. Its not about trying to impress, its about being polite.
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RHP User
13 years ago
....
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'anythingjustnow'I was always taught to open the car door for a lady. Same goes for walking through a doorway, ladies first. When I go out with a lady, I always insist on paying ( I've actually gotten in trouble for this a few time recently, because the lady thought it was rude). It's how I was brought up. To me, these things are as important as covering your mouth when you yawn or sneeze. Its not about trying to impress, its about being polite. Not being rude at all paying for dinner. Just that most of us women have had it bashed into our heads that a man pays for meals cause he is only after sex with you and alot of women feel that they have to sleep with you as they "owe" you! A guy can pay for my KFC anyday! Hugs...xFunlovingx
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erotictouch4u
13 years ago
In this world of instant everything, convenience and me first attitude, the upbringing I had to always treat women with respect and kindness has never left me regardless of how badly some have treated me in the past, as there are many more who appreciate it than those who do not (or expect it). Being chivalrous sometimes also means offering to pay but accepting her insistance to share as otherwise it could be considered rude to not allow a lady her wish. Continued insistance is not gentlemanly either. Mind though, sometimes opening a door for a lady means walking in first and holding it open for her to walk through after you... ET xox
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RHP User
13 years ago
yeah see, that just annoys me, i understand where your coming from with the thought that a guy is just after sex. its a shame that people instantly think that, rather than accept a respectful kind gesture. I like to meet people for dinner or for a coffee so that i get to know them. if something develops from that, then its cool but everyone involved should feel comfortabl. If one of the people feels like they "owe" or feel pressured, then how can everyone involved truly enjoy themselves?Having said that, i'd much rather cook for lady than take her to dinner :) reckon that'd be better than KFC xFunlovingx
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Mr_DarkChocolate
13 years ago
"Give me a real man anyday! A man that opens the door for me...that will pay for meals...That will throw his coat over a puddle so I can walk over it without getting my shoes wet! Love it all!" not to be a stickler but would u do all those thing's for a man to be a real woman ?i believe in being a gentleman's gentleman but at the same time it's a razor's edge balancing it with women's equality, hell u yelled screamed & threw tantrum's for it so we might as well give into it, my last name basically ((hard to explain it's a culture thing)) dictates that i have to behave a certain way for it to be becoming so i was raised to respect anybody & everybody regardless of their couture, colour or whatever else u can come up with but where i see fault with with this whole thing is & u guessed it equality, okay both men & women make the same amount these day's, woman are just as successful if not more because they are a little babied, now what i'm trying to say is chivalry is a two way street, i'll open a door, give u my coat & carry u over puddles ((who in their right mind thought putting the coat on the puddle would be a good idea ?)) but what will u do ? will u resiprocate ? ((i'm not talking about ur vagina, couldn't care less about ur vagina)) what i'm talking about is if ur chivalrous with ur partner wouldn't u expect them to be the same with u ? what is chivalry for a woman ? because i haven't seen it so enlighten me please
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'anythingjustnow'You're cute!! :D
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RHP User
13 years ago
to have my meals paid for or doors opened ,but I do think it would be churlish of me to object to such curtesies. Generosity of spirit,kindness,and a gentle heart,are all qualities I admire in either gender.Living with honour is something that we can al aspire to IMO.x R
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RHP User
13 years ago
ty you brave_heart
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RHP User
13 years ago
For a real woman who accepts his behaviour gracefully.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Chivalry.. The best way to make a woman fall for you!
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RHP User
13 years ago
I like that ! I was brought up to be polite and respectful and to extend gentlemanly behaviour towards women. And I do, But............I'd like it to be appreciated, too often when holding a door open or giving way to a shopping trolley or pram the recipient will just ignore the gesture as if it is some god given right, nose in the air your'e invisible, hate that ! I don't expect much, eye contact, the slightest of smiles, just a wee recognition that I have been seen.The money thing.too often I believe, men use the "but I payed for everything " line as leverage to obligate the woman. It happens a lot, and I do not want to be part of it, further many woman now find it condescending and I understand and appreciate that, I will offer to pay and will, but if Dutch is offered I accept, to me it is a sign of her good character.I usually find I have good judgement in these things and feel it is better for all concerned if the playing field is level.There was a time when a date would order the oysters, the lobster and the best champagne knowing that they were taking advantage, either woman have moved on from that kind of behaviour or I am making better choices.Who knows ?
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RHP User
13 years ago
but it is lovely when these things happen. Makes me feel special! Anything that makes someone feel good and smile is worth the effort in my opinion and hey, if it makes you stand out from the rest, it has to be a good thing right? My exception is for the paying for meals - sweet for the first date, but after that, I think it should be even. Mrs Waterbabes XXX
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'xFunlovingx' That will throw his coat over a puddle so I can walk over it without getting my shoes wet! That's called "laying the mac down", I learnt that somewhere once upon a time. Men used to lay down their Macintosh jackets for women so their shoes remained dry. Chivalry FTW! Love it too :)
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RHP User
13 years ago
I don't require these things, as long as the person is kind, respectful and polite, however when a man does demonstrate true chivalry and opens a door etc, it is lovely and most appreciated. I really don't understand women who react rudely to these gestures. Manners don't cost a thing... Womens chivalry? Hmm Milkchoc, I'd like to think it would be responding to any acts of male chivalry with politeness. It would be listening to male drivel (things we may not be interested in like sport, cars etc ) with keen interest and participating in said conversations. Making men feel like men. All those things we women did back in the day when all men wore chivalry with pride. But whilst not losing ourselves and our voices in the process.
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RHP User
13 years ago
Chivalry; Opening doors... A simple courtesy that I think should be afforded to all people in circumstances where you can! I also believe it is a sign of respect for you to open a door for a woman.. Regardless if its your date, mum, sister or wife... Paying for dates.. I believe that yes you should pay for the first date, but in a relationship there is give and take. Common courteous behaviour is still alive and well in society... Sometimes people don't realise it's right in front of them... Eg when a door has been held open for you and you don't acknowledge it!
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'Freya13' to have my meals paid for or doors opened ,but I do think it would be churlish of me to object to such curtesies. Generosity of spirit,kindness,and a gentle heart,are all qualities I admire in either gender.Living with honour is something that we can al aspire to IMO.x R Chivalry should extend beyond those who we know and to the public in general, i don't believe it's gender specific either.If i open the car door for a woman, i expect her to unlock mine ...assuming i don't have central lockingIn this rat race of a world we live in some people have forgotten to be polite...
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'brave__heart' Quoting 'anythingjustnow'You're cute!! :D
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RHP User
13 years ago
The story of the the coat over the puddle may be apocryphal but it is attributed to Sir Walter Raliegh who apparently took off his cloak for Elizabeth 1 when she stepped out of her carriage and almost into a puddle. On average women still earn considerably less than men,but so called equality IMHO should never be an excuse for discourtesy. x R
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RHP User
13 years ago
I'm with you most of the way but I'm not about to throw my coat across a puddle. Leather's too expensive. Is it okay if I just piggyback you to keep those little tootsiepegs of yours dry?
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RHP User
13 years ago
we think so, and we'd qualify chivalry in the same terms that Braveheart did... its not just about pulling a chair out.... its about how you treat the women in your life, whether they be partner, parent, friend, casual acquaintance or even combatant. being honest, open and trusting with your lady also rates highly. ...........
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RHP User
13 years ago
Hes all those things. Very chivalrous.
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luvsilver
13 years ago
Dont think chivalry is dead WAus but is certainly on the endangered list. I do try to keep it alive and well because thats how i was taught while growing up. Likewise i am trying my best to also pass this on to my four sons as they grow up. Mr Luvsilver.
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RHP User
13 years ago
So, if chivalry is just good manners (according to most of you), then I rephrase my "most of the time" comment to 99% of the time, and not just women... Complete strangers to. Like a lot of you, I was raised to be polite and courteous to everyone and always respectful of women. Something that I think 90% of the younger generation have forgotten.
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RHP User
13 years ago
I too am a HUGE fan of chivalry. I have raised my 15 year old son to be this way, he opens doors for me, carries heavy things for me etc etc and doing so for myself and other females is natural for him....and I always acknowledge with even just a quiet "thanks mate"... I also always say thank you to anyone else that does so for me. There is no harm at all in a thank you said with a smile and sometimes I can see that such a brief acknowledgment has made that persons day a little happier:) I have to agree with 50zcool and LMFAO14, too often it goes unappreciated..the number of times my son has held a door for a lady, helped them with a pram etc and not even a quick thank you or polite smile was returned to him. So it is little wonder "the younger generation" no longer uphold the "standard" if common courtesy is not returned to them:)
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RHP User
13 years ago
Quoting 'sydneygirlforfun'I have to agree with 50zcool and LMFAO14, too often it goes unappreciated..the number of times my son has held a door for a lady, helped them with a pram etc and not even a quick thank you or polite smile was returned to him. So it is little wonder "the younger generation" no longer uphold the "standard" if common courtesy is not returned to them:) I find acknowledging chivalry as important as being chivalrous. How often do I see a man hold a door for a woman or help her into her coat, only for her to completely ignore the gesture? Or him, for that matter. I think it's my right to be treated like a lady. Just like it's my obligation to be appreciative.
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RHP User
13 years ago
see, i like that people are appreciative, but it's not really a concern if people dont say thank you. don't get me wrong, it's nice that a person would acknowledge if i have done something for them, but in the end, to me, having done that chivalrous act is enough.
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RHP User
13 years ago
It is so pleasing that most women seem to still appreciate the act of chivalry when it relates to treating a woman with kindness and courtesy! Given that I was raised with manners, I find that displaying manners to woman, man and child across the board....is a "way of being" and so I like to "give chivalry" unconditionally, as a course of behaviour, whether it is appreciated or not .......and not to expect favours or good deeds in return. Of course, it is wonderful when it is appreciated in this "age of confused ettiquette", by people who obviously were taught respect in family life within our society.
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Cheekyarses
13 years ago
I agree with Brave Heart - very well said.
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RHP User
13 years ago
A lot has been said about paying for dinner etc. my foolproof solution whenever this comes up is to just say, "I'll grab dinner and you grab the drinks. Hows that?" works every time. Cheers dan
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