M54 F54
Parties and Meeting
November 03 2011
Comments
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RHP User
14 years ago
Hi foreverustwo, We are also new to the parties and couples club scene. Great questions, we haven't been to any yet and are going to our first one in December. Looking forward to the responses :)
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RHP User
14 years ago
hi we are thinking of doing the club sceene as we havnt yet an d we meet a nice couple on friday night and am looking forward to meeting them again and we have all decided that at the next meet we would be heading to one of the club scenes together for our next meet so u have asked good questions and as we are also new to this stage of rhp we are interested in what the answers are so we can take in some advice r&d
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RHP User
14 years ago
Couples forget what it is like to be a single. Of course single gals will stick together initially, it can be pretty intimidating going to swingers clubs and private parties on your own. Well unless you are very confident and outgoing girl who is used to the scene! If you make eye contact or talk to someone, this in no way means that you have to play with them. Sounds to me like you were at a party with lots of new people to the scene maybe? You shouldn't make assumptions about people. Some people go only to socialise and meet others, some people may not be in the mood to play that night, some people just go to watch, others will play with as many people as possible & some will only play with their partner, some couples will only play with other girls, etc, etc. Just chat to people and ask the question - What are you looking for tonight? As for meeting people for a coffee first. I think that is a good idea. Or if you do meet them at a swingers club for the first time, well that can be problematic if you don't make your intentions clear. I would suggest you say that you never play with people on the first meeting if you do decide to meet people at the club. That way nobody is disappointed, and if you do find each other irresistible well that is good too. I mean rules are made to be broken!Hahaha I have to laugh at myself. I am no expert, I have only been to few events myself but these are my observations and things I have picked up from other swingers and from reading the forum. Happy fucking!xxMeeks
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RHP User
14 years ago
Every couple is different, some people will go to a club without knowing anyone or without making pre-arranged plans to meet anyone. They go to mingle and meet knew people on the night. Although, you will probably find once you are in the scene long enough that you will see familiar faces around the traps. xxMeeks
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RHP User
14 years ago
It can be intimdating at parties, especially large parties of 30 people or more. I went to one such party recently and two couples left before the party got started because they felt intimidated which is fair enough. These parties are run by the organisers for profit, and as such more single guys attend these parties than couples or single females because they are the paying guests. As I am naturally shy, I can imagine how difficult it would be for a member of the opposite sex to approach someone and ask to play, if they are standing in a large group. Sometimes you havve to bite the bullet and ask. The worst thing that can happen is that they say no and if they do, respect their right to say no and move on. I have had a lot of success at parties by waiting until a woman has just finished fucking someoneor a group, then I make eye contact and point to myself or ask if I can play. I have never had a woman say no yet. People are more inclined to play at a party than privately.
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RHP User
14 years ago
I agree with loads of what Meeks my buddy above has said but also ......After attending a couple of different venues (Parties), a few questions have come to mind and we thought to seek some answers from more experienced members. OK Great lets go ! We noticed that at a larger party, that people were reluctant to make small talk and in some cases eye contact. Could it be that by doing so it implies that they are wanting to have sex with that person or couple? NO , We talk and make eye contact all the time with people at parties and clubs it doesnt mean we want to pork them just because we look at them ! Lord if it did we'd be BUSY! We are kings of small talk and big talk. Some people are just shy and FFS it is really pretty scarey at an event like this for many its there first time there or even thier fifth ....... still scarey. It took us a while before we got use to it and our pulses got under 200 a minute ! We also noticed that there were single females attending this party, yet they all stood around talking to each other. Is this common or would it be a safety in numbers thing? Well firstly yes they have the fact that they are single girls at a party where loads of people are wanting to get into thier pants .....in common ! Yes I would imagine that sticking together again is a good idea if your pulse as well is up over 200 a min resting ! Another thing and this is something that I talk about all the time .... people / couples rarely almost never think to going over and talking to single girls !!! YUP sounds dumb huh ! Sarah will always make a b line for them and it is why we appear so lucky we simply talk to them ! Seriously there are some amazing looking girls that we have met who sat in the cnr with couples staring at them with no idea what to do , we went over , we chatted , we ...... well you get the idea ...........go talk to them , they arent going to come to you ! At one of the venues we attended, we pre arranged to meet another couple there (after meeting them for coffee a few days before), is this the way most couples go to a club / party, knowing other attendees beforehand? Different strokes different folks. We never do , we prefer to meet there. We go with no expectations at all. We ask the same of everyone we ask to meet! If it works for you great in saying that some of Sarah and my best night have come when we expected to meet no one arranged no one ... and suddenly WOW ....... last friday was one of those ! Any feedback and comments most appreciated as we are feeling our way into the scene. Any more questions for Brae's school of swing ? We all do it different so we are only letting you know what we do. Thanks M & E Thats OK !OH and dont touch other females without asking or Sarah will smack your hand like a naughty child and stare at you like she is about to set upon you with a knife !!!! I suspect there are other out there similiar idea less dramatic ...... Sarah is one of a kind !Brae's school of luuuuuuuuuurve !
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RHP User
14 years ago
Quoting 'looking2try3' We noticed that at a larger party, that people were reluctant to make small talk and in some cases eye contact. Could it be that by doing so it implies that they are wanting to have sex with that person or couple? NO , We talk and make eye contact all the time with people at parties and clubs it doesnt mean we want to pork them just because we look at them ! Lord if it did we'd be BUSY!Brae... I saw you looking at me... wanna pork? hahaha love that term. xxMeeka
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RHP User
14 years ago
Thanks everyone for some good feedback, Meeka100, you must be right, there must have been a lot of newbies (like us!) there one night. We noticed a lot were not making eye contact, which we thought strange at first, until we made eye contact with another couple and had them literally follow us around for the next half hour!....lol. Hence the question there. We would never had of thought to approach the single girls, probably going back to High School days where you risked you life (ego) if you ventured to the group of girls! lol Really interested in other ppls experiences as I believe other are on this site, so please don't be shy and post up your thoughts or experiences! Thanks again. M&E
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RHP User
14 years ago
The great mystery... don't forget that everyone there are regular people and if you're interested, there's no point in being shy and if you're not interested, "not now thanks" is pretty easy to say.... Eye contact or secret signals or any other mythical observation ... following people around all night... all that.... it's all crap. Whose got the time? really. If you don't know if someone is interested in you.... that's not your problem, it's theirs.Oh... and rejections.... all experienced players are used to it... not everyone suits everyone... that's life.. get used to it... don't take it personally.... if you're not shagging there's still plenty of socialising you can do... so don't sweat the small stuff. HugsStalky
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RHP User
14 years ago
That's not really accurate. Most of the private parties Ive been to are hosted by filthy motherfuckers just like me. They'e in it for the sin. If you had to make a business of it, you'd find it pretty tough to pay the lube bill. It's more like a community service ffs! anyway... I suppose that's difficult to appreciate when you're forking over your money. :pHugsStalkyQuoting 'CHRISJM' ........These parties are run by the organisers for profit,
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RHP User
14 years ago
Stalky, you are correct to a degree, but at a few of the parties I attended, the organiser didn't play. Heaps of single guys there though which could make it hard to get a fuck. Most of the parties have been held in apartments or hotel rooms, so the cost has to be covered in some way. A big thank you to you however for giving me the idea to go to parties. We actually met at a meet and greet night in Parramatta a few years ago where you suggested I attend parties as I was unable to meet anyone privately. Took me a while to pluck up the courage to go, but I have never looked back. I have never fucked so much in all my life and having a great time. Hope to meet you again one day.
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RHP User
14 years ago
My wife and I are planning to attend our first party in the next month or so, so it has been great reading the comments here. Thanks to you all.
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RHP User
14 years ago
We have been there done that and can say that really, there are no rules when it comes to such things as 'reading' signals or even if such signals exist.Each party you attend, even if it is the same host, the same location and even the same people will be different for one reason or other and often what works for you one week will not work the next. As such, attend each and every party with an open mind and no predetermination as to what the party will be like, and simply go with the flow.If you see people you like then by all means try eye contact, or small talk/conversation or whatever you feel most comfortable with and if they like you, find you attractive and interesting then they will likely reply in kind. However, you always need to bare in mind that your approach may be seen by some as pushy, by others as wimpy and by some as not even being an approach. Again, simply horses for courses so to speak.We have been to a lot of parties over the years and no doubt we have missed some signals, misread others and often given off signals which have been misinterpreted and misread, but when all is read right then we do have fun.So our advice would simply be to try, watch, listen, learn and feel comfortable enough in the environment to express yourselves, but do not be offended if those you seek are not there, or reject or misinterpret as to get that yes, lets have fun is often far harder than many imagineShell and Gaz
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rupamohan
14 years ago
If you are going to party follow up the link here at RHP where PPL register their interest...if u like anybody pre-arrange to meet them. May be highlight in your profile your party date for other to contact you in advance. We are quite shy and didn't find party very useful if we don't know PPL in advance. We find a personalised date more convinient..we also found open sex at party bit intimidating for us.. I guess some PPL only prefer to meet at party so be aware of this, if you exchange number at a party in a hope to meet 1 to1
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RHP User
14 years ago
We are going to our first party this month and really hope that people are friendly! Thanks for everyone's comments - will wrok on the eye contact!
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rupamohan
14 years ago
You are right every body has own defination of what is pushy and varies a lot...party runners can ask first timers what are their main concerns and try to define words as "Pushy" in more specific terms and can prepare some kind of cue card..with some last minute useful tip just to remind and everybody sync to similar understanding..
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RHP User
14 years ago
TigressTiger good luck and I am sure that you will enjoy yourselves. You will be amazed at how friendly people will be, especially when they realise that it is your first party. Try not to be intimidated, especially if it is a large party of 30 plus people. Just remember to respect others at all times and don't be afraid to say no, it is your right. All the best. Chris
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Innercircle
14 years ago
I think it comes down to the selection of people invited. We spend more time making sure people are going to be somewhat compatible personality wise, than we do actually hosting the events. It makes for a lot more work, but a party with 15 random couples always has a handful that don't seem to get into it as much. Regardless of numbers, quality of selection is more important than quantity...And, it's the hosts job to make EVERYONE feel safe, comfortable, and make sure everyone has met everyone else. That removes a lot of 'fear' that some people have when attending a party with a bunch of others they don't yet know.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Hey, me and my boyfriend never even actually get enough time to go out to parties or to even meet people really outside of work, So if there is anyone out there that is interested in just a simple drink or something to even do please message us :) (Preferably girls or couples) P.s. feel kind of sad doing this but its the last resort, thanks.
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RHP User
14 years ago
My friend and I found the same thing and couples clubs can be really tacky and even predatory. We went to a Sybian party in Sydney a few months ago and it was nothing like the other parties. It was sexy and people hooked up but everyone had a shared experience - the Sybian. This made everyone talk non-stop. I guess there was less action than a normal swingers night but what action there was was quality. My friend loved the Sybian. We went again last week.
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RHP User
14 years ago
Hey everyone, thanks for your interest and feedbcak through this topic. It appears as though we are not alone in what we experienced. We have decided to give the parties another try earlier in the new year and will take on board all the suggestions everyone put forward. Hope to see some of your there!
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RHP User
14 years ago
we attend,if dull boring people.we tend to ourselvees.take whom we want...just a confident fucking couple....causes abit of a riff on the nite.hey thats swinging...ourway.
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RHP User
14 years ago
We like the idea of a party just for newbies, as going can be and is a bit thretening. Would be nice to be around people who as new 2 it all as well. and we would be way up for that night Do not get us wrong we have nothing against experianced people as we need 2 learn from someone. tryit3
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