F72
Stimulating the mind
May 19 2017
Comments
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RHP User
9 years ago
Hard one to write about and try not to sound like a dick or offend people but here goes. I get very bored as I am a thinker and have a very active and inquisitive mind, am educated, well read on many things so have a bit of knowledge on all sorts of topics. I have many friends from all walks of life but only those with a quick wit, interest in heaps of stuff and like to speak on a deeper level are the ones that I spend long hours with. So in here it is the same. Sex to me is just plain boring and not worth my time if there is no conversation, connection and banter, I'd rather go home and have a wank. But I have never been one for an NSA quickie anyway. I actually love talking to someone without a photo as I can see if we connect on a level that is important for me instead of that initial attraction of ones photos. I think if you tend to think with your smaller head you search for a good looking girl. Really wanting to find someone who will become a friend as well. I do not like to speak of politics as I do not follow it and am a believer that we are always lied to anyway I call our way of politics a democratic dictatorship., we are free to vote but that's where true democracy ends. Religion is only a no go if the other party is not open to all religions including Atheism. Humour well that is something that takes some time to work out and I have to be very careful as my humour is very broad and can be extremely dark and I can take the piss out of anything as I have had a full on life at times. I accept all that has happened in my life so it makes it easy to laugh at anything. So that is a short snippet of why I need stimulation of the mind and connection. Goes much deeper than that and like most of us thinkers out there could probably write a short story on it. Should be an interesting topic to follow Q. Cheers
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Sawadee
9 years ago
No chemistry , no connection.. Great eye contact and a irresistible smile . Eyes talk , so sometime you don't need to say that much at all. Not saying I don't know how to stimulate a ladies mind. I do that all the time in my business. But socially , if you're looking to dump your knowledge on me when you should be relaxing , I'll lose interest real quick. Seriously, if you really need to show you're a mental giant , you can come across as quite boring .. In saying that , let me say this ? That's my opinion . I'm sure there's people out there who's chemistry is stimulated by that alone.. I think you can be smart and relaxed, now thats chemistry in its self..
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RHP User
9 years ago
A fine question indeed So what is it you seek All pour souls need a hand So please help to understand Some like humor, other cheek I guess most want a peek Into a mind to reap The sight should not be cheap However liking's do differ One's gem an others bicker So what is it you seek Finding it makes one's week
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RHP User
9 years ago
Damn I screwed up the first line
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RHP User
9 years ago
it should read poor and not pour....
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RHP User
9 years ago
I just want hangs and bangs.. as long they can have a conversation I don't really mind what its about . Political views don't come into the equation .
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rupamohan
9 years ago
Our views will follow in post 2 but here is quick post 1 😂 Well answer depends on also group of people you ask. If you were somehow able to ask most of the young lot who is so busy rooting that they don't have time for these forums. The answer can be way different from what you are likely to get from forumites.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I like...no, make that...I love a wicked sense of humour. And by wicked, I mean someone who can skirt the borders of bad taste without overstepping that mark. By recognising that mark, their values must be similar to mine. But, I don't require it....unless they were a potential long term partner.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Yeah, I'm the same, there's a fine line between intellectual conversation and me looking at my watch "Oh is that the time already?" 😏 To be honest I don't like or require much conversation, sometimes none, or practically none when I've met a guy out in public, random thing, one or two lines, then kiss and you know the rest, but if starting the communication online, I need to know they care about me, that I matter, that they long to spend time with me and are genuinely interested in me the person, and my pleasure, not just in it for some quick self indulgence. So the chat happens before meeting, during which time I hope or need some kind of connection to begin. When I meet them, there is little or no conversation 😉 I'm a down to business type of person, why waste time? But I have to be honest, as time moves on, I'm not meeting many guys, not many are the kind of lovers that I'm looking for. I have zero interest in 5 minute fucks, I want more than that, and I deserve more than that. So I wait......and I wait....for the next gem. The wait is worth it, but connection for me is more important now than it ever was. I just can't be bothered giving up my time for the potentially selfish ones. I did have a slip with a 5 minute fuck the other day lol so the above rules aren't set in stone, occasionally a quickie in public is hot stuff 😄 and if we're in the same vicinity, convenient, I do that sometimes, usually though try to line up longer play sessions
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RHP User
9 years ago
Before you fuck my body is something I say often. But that sounds extremely intense and complicated and it's really not. I'm a sapiosexual too. I'm an over thinker, a dreamer, a inquirer, a lover. Pique my interest. It could be that we can talk until all hours and endlessly about a large range of topics. It could be that you capture my inquisitive side or that your sense of humour and wit are sexy AF. It's hard to explain because there is just that click. That banter that stretches beyond small talk. That flows freely, creates desire, sparks interest about that person and not their body.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Or at least, be on par. "Many forumites say that before they can have sex with someone their mind needs to be stimulated first But what does this mean for you? " For me, this means that the person needs to at least demonstrate an interest and an understanding in my favourite subjects, eg. Economics, Finance, Metaphysics, Esotericism, Health, Alternative Health Therapies, Science, Geography, Food and Nutrition, Current Affairs and Conspiracy Theories (!!!). And then, there are the "softer" topics like Gardening, Living Off the Grid, Architecture and Interior Design, and Travel. Body language is important - are they leaning forward and listening with interest? Or have I lost them somewhere at the beginning of the sentence? :P Intellectal "stamina" and "fortitude"... that's what I like! A curious mind is exciting - it's always ok to react with discomfort at new, very controversial ideas but people who take time to think, ponder and find out more before going into attack and destroy mode... I find that restraint sexy! "Are you looking for someone who can talk about absolutely everything and nothing? Someone who is like minded politically and if they weren't would this be a deal breaker for you?" Yes! No holds barred! Someone who is curious about anything and everything! Someone observant and very involved in the world we live in. Whilst being of similar political inclinations isn't important to me, I avoid extreme Left or extreme Right views. However, I cannot tolerate political views that end up incurring lots of expenses without addressing the fundamental issue of revenue - where are we going to get the money to fund the program(s)? That's where the Greens and Extreme Leftists lose me. Or do you get turned off by someone who exhibits far too many smarts? Nope! Bring it on! I'm a nerdette myself - a female nerd, a phrase I coined combining Nerd + Smurfette. Geeks intrigue and excite me! And if they mutter scientific / technical gibberish and I can't understand them, all the better! Do you require someone with a sense of humour.? But " humour" can be a two edged sword,one persons joke can be another's insult. Well said, OP! My style is caustic humour. I love jokes that are politically very incorrect. I laugh at myself, laugh at my very real struggles and illnesses, laugh at every bloody thing. But just like what you said, there are people who can't stop laughing when I crack my jokes, and then there are those, usually those who take life way too seriously, who absolutely hate me and take offence at everything I say. Someone who can relax and laugh easily instead of someone who starts to take offence at what's intended to be funny will be uber sexy to me! I wish work didn't get in the way of me attending the few home-grown comedians at the recent Melbourne Comedy Festival who had all suffered from illnesses and mental health issues, and have managed to laugh at it all and decided to handle these topics during their comedy acts. Class acts! Hats off to them! I won't forget an ex bf staring in amazement as I was severely depressed and crying but still cracking jokes and laughing through my copious tears. He said he has never known anyone who can laugh and crack jokes when they are as severely depressed with the bloody lemon tree orchard's worth of lemons dumped on them. We're good friends till now. So,explain yourselves :)..what kind of mind do you have,and what will float your boat? ..curious Q What really floats my boat? Someone with emotional, psychological and mental fortitude. Someone who can pep talk themselves out of depression ruts - who doesn't get depressed? It's not about falling into the pit - it's about the desire to fight to get out of it eventually that really matters. There's a time to weep... but there has to eventually be a time to roll up their sleeves, turn their faces up at the sun, and determine to fight! It's not the scars inflicted by life that I mind... it's the festering ones that one never allows to heal ever, despite the gentle passing of time, that frightens me. An individual's strength, confidence and wherewithal, the innate desire to fight to survive and yet stick to high moral values, the pride taken at a job well-done, the Desiderata and the Zen way of life... SEXY!!! And if a man can turn knowledge into very practical wisdom, oooh la la!!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
I'd love to hear your answers to those questions too! PS. I really love how "Q" sounds - it's got that allure like "M" in James Bond movies!
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RHP User
9 years ago
I'd love to hear your answers to those questions too! PS. I really love how "Q" sounds - it's got that allure like "M" in James Bond movies!
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Sawadee
9 years ago
If I have to come across as a mental giant when we first meet , it ain't going to happen. If you as a person like chemistry and a flowing conversation, it's because there's something there to build on.. Like ' touch ' I'll be looking for a quick exit if you insist on wanting to show your capacity for current affairs.. After reading a few of the above posts , I've already taken a mental note of.. Pass... ?
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RHP User
9 years ago
I'm attracted* to people who are intelligent and engaging. What one might interpret as 'Mental Gigantism' in someone, another person might recognise as an inquiring and engaging mind. I value people who indicate capacity and preparedness to think and to engage on topics beyond the mundane. This does not mean I wish to meet only someone who shares my view on all things. I'm always pleased to meet people who have varied interests and genuine passion in their lives; something that gets them excited. Absent that kind of spark, it wouldn't matter at all to me how physically attractive a woman appears... * In more than simply in the sexual sense of attraction/interest.
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RHP User
9 years ago
How I wish you asked a simpler question. I find it difficult to answer as my mind is often a mystery to myself as well. Knowing can be an obstacle. With not knowing, I am open, ready to be surprised. I guess those who can accept many faces of me. Passion they feel for whatever they are doing inspires me. Kindness. I want to be proud to share a moment with them. They don't try to impress me. Yes, they do need to be educated (it's not a sin) but still curious and willing to listen. Exchange of ideas. Humble, yet not afraid to challenge me...not with cheap "deep" thoughts without substance, but with conviction that comes from structured reasoning behind. Those who can laugh at themselves and let me be a child. Those who can work in silence and let me be in one too. And here I come to Hatter (Ms)
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Having a perchant for the English language is one thing , appearing like you're trying to show everyone you have ' is quite another. Never underestimate the person you're trying to impress or suppress because they might just very well surprise you.. ? There's a time and place to thump one's chest and I don't think RHP is one of them. My view of this site is that everyone should try and stay light hearted and soak up the fun , then if you meet someone you like and you feel the need to ear bash them with your superior knowledge , go for it... at least the rest of us are spared..
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RHP User
9 years ago
Use short words but long strokes. Too much stimulation can be tiresome 😏 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
I thought I'd just share this one as I find it rather interesting and a little sad. I have several friends that were not lucky enough to have the education and nurturing I received from my mother. A couple of these friends (fantastic people and very gifted and talented in their own ways) have accused me of being too smart for my own good but when one word suffices for six I use it. Not to sound like a brain or better than someone just because I use many words frequently that are very common just not to those who are not into reading or the English language. I actually sometimes just shut up as I realise my thoughts may just go over their heads. Cheers
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' I need someone I click with mentally, which means we are at a similar level smarts wise and we share the same interests and sense of humour, as well as other views I value (religion, politics, animal welfare, etc) I'm looking for ongoing trysts rather than one-off encounters, and I couldn't continue to be attracted to someone I didn't find interesting, funny, or of a similar mindset (at least to some extend) as myself. Not looking for my twin, nor the ideal man, but someone who "fits" me, if you will. Hope that makes sense. If he fits you, isn't he your ideal (lucky) man
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'jayme2' Having a perchant for the English language is one thing , appearing like you're trying to show everyone you have ' is quite another. Never underestimate the person you're trying to impress or suppress because they might just very well surprise you.. ? There's a time and place to thump one's chest and I don't think RHP is one of them. My view of this site is that everyone should try and stay light hearted and soak up the fun , then if you meet someone you like and you feel the need to ear bash them with your superior knowledge , go for it... at least the rest of us are spared.. am I to take it this in reference to me? I'll bite ; ) It is worthwhile to note the forum is a mode of communication, and a place to exchange ideas. English has been the dominant language in my life. ..."trying to show everyone you have"... What might you suggest I am trying to show? (Interest in ideas, conversation and wordplay beyond only topics of a sexually explicit nature as part of my own use of this site, and in my own determination of interest and/or potential compatibility with others here? If so, you would be correct). Were I underestimating the capacity of others, would it not be more likely I would confine my discussion to simple concepts and matters conveyed in small words? If it is perceived I've communicated obscure and complicated concepts and vocabulary, it may be I have actually overestimated some in the audience here! As for suppression, you might consider calls for censorship or moderation of someone's communications (rather than simply scrolling past posts you do not wish to read, do not agree with, or which perhaps you do not understand) is itself a form of suppression on your part. Putting forward another perspective (or a reasoned counter-argument) and inviting further discussion is actually the antithesis of 'suppression'. Your use of the terms: "My view of this site", "thump one's chest" and "ear bash" suggest you have some form of problem accepting other people are free to hold and to express views different to your own. It may surprise you to learn I am one of many people in society who find interest and derive pleasure from learning the experiences and perspectives of others, and also the discussion and testing of each other's thinking on a range of matters. You need not worry about me encroaching upon your own chances with the women participating on this site; I live in an entirely different part of the country to you (and in any event, it appears highly likely we are each attracted to very different qualities in women we might ever meet). The sarcasm of "La de dah" at the subject line, combined with the body of your post reads to me as being very close-minded. This begs question as to what actually attracted you to this thread (?) Is your mind feeling stimulated now?
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RHP User
9 years ago
Even the simplest of words can be misconstrued though. You commented on me being 'sassy', I think it was way, back when and we both saw what it meant so differently. That was funny. Peachy
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RHP User
9 years ago
If I have a passion for certain topics since my teenage years, and I can't contain my enthusiasm for them, then it's elementary... they constitute an intrinsic part of me. And if someone who is obviously not on the same boat, starts to make insinuations and catty remarks about my interests, it's totally unfounded and unnecessary. What? I'm not allowed to love what I'm passionate about? That's totally preposterous! Just because my genuine interests differ from someone else's does not make me pretentious - it makes the person making the insidious remarks look like a sour puss. Bitter with baggage, much? Please take a pass at those of us who actually love stuff you do not, like current affairs, jayme. I consider that a huge compliment, thank you very much! =D Don't taint me with that cynicism and gall. No love lost because the attraction would've ranked in the alarmingly low negatives anyway. Sometimes, there's wisdom in letting sleeping dogs lie. I love to give as good as I get. An unprovoked attack, and all because I participated in this interesting thread. So unfounded, so nonsensical, and so bogan. If my posts upset you this much, I'll make sure I'll write even more in my free time! Sheesh! The bloody nerve of some people!
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RHP User
9 years ago
And varied responses,thank you. I am a curious person and enjoy spending time with people who have a similar mindset.The older I get,the more I want to know and I realise how little I know. I just can't spend a lot of time with anyone who doesn't have a strong sense of social justice,is bigoted ,and is right wing in there views,In my opinion politics is not just about who you vote for but your world view. If you have emotional intelligence,have a genuine interest in me,then that is more important than being a rocket scientist ,but they are cool too.:). I am no genius but a reasonably intelligent woman who refuses to "dumb down",something that women have been forced to do for centuries. I celebrate the fact that this is now changing.Any man who does not appreciate this is certainly not for me. Q
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RHP User
9 years ago
Prior to ripping my kit off, getting naked and doing the horizontal tango is essential. For me it starts with a message that digs a little deeper than the stock standard, "Hey you're hot," or "Hey Babe, how's your weekend." I don't even respond to those now. I need a little something to sink my teeth into. At our age most sex is good sex, we've had enough practice to know how to bump pretties well...these days it is as much about revealing something about yourself in the first message. I know this is a sex/swingers site but that doesn't negate the need for chemistry. I am equal parts sapiophile, roaring hedonist and connection junkie. If I'm not intrigued by who you are as a person, you're gonna bore me as a lover. Creativity and imagination combined with communication, confidence and skill narrows the selection significantly - but if I don't want to engage in conversation over dinner, I'm sure as hell not going to want to fuck. We never get a second chance at a first impression and effort goes a long way. Effort - If a lover isn't prepared to put the effort into communicating, they're not going to give it in bed either. First message - make it count! well, communicate about who you are and why your contacting me. Texts - not just cock shots, and "Hey Babe." Dick picks are a dime a dozen (yawn) given me something to think about while I go about my day. I love a hot body and a beautiful cock but eyes and smiles and a well thought out or funny text are game changers. Fascination - this really is key. We all want to feel wanted, desired, special in some way, even if only for a night. Most people like to talk about themselves, asking questions, getting in there and discovering what makes me laugh, what my fantasies are, my favourite food, music. At the end of the day, this is just smart strategy, dating reconnaissance. The more of a feel you have for someone, the better your time and the sex will be. Vulnerability - Be open to having questions asked about you. We can all fuck, we can't all 'pop the hood' and give good conversation. Now I know intimacy isn't everyone's bag and there are 'no go zones' and things that are not relevant for a one night stand or a few casual encounters but generally, I won't fuck someone who won't give up something of themselves. Maybe decide on the things you are comfortable sharing and hone those topics. When bodies join we are giving as we're taking - a verbal fucking first helps! Laughter - this is HuGE. Make me laugh and you'll win me forever. There is no sexier trait than having the skill to be able to make someone laugh. Thing is, ya kinda need to do a little of the afore mentioned things to find out what's going o tickle their humour. Anticipation - the build! Oh my god! Once the ground work is laid and you know the your in...there is nothing more yummy than a lover who knows how to fan the flame of anticipation. If I arrive at the date, knickers already wet, there's a chance something we may get arrested for could happen as a preview of coming attractions later. Those are my thoughts. I need to feel connection, be teased into longing, held there, made to edge and then have gratification delayed over dinner. I also need a debauched lover who isn't afraid to use his mind as much as his body and who understands that sex is just another way we communicate (and it's great for staying fit and way more fun than a marathon).
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RHP User
9 years ago
💋😇
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RHP User
9 years ago
An inquiring mind... imperfect as we all are... but always exploring... asking WHY? No accepting what Donald... and Malcolm tell us... or perhaps even worse what Dickhead Dutton tries to tell is is the "alternative truth"... always be curious... accept that we all get it wrong at times... but at least think about stuff. Let people do as they do... as long as the hurt nobody! Ask me about things I have not thought about... or perhaps even pose an argument I had never considered... Then extend her wrists so they may be bound... or bend over so her cheeks may be spanked... Life is full of diversity and wonder... let us respect that... and laugh.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Where did that come from? I didn't see anyone having a go at you? Just remember that shouting at people won't make them listen, quite the opposite,. You don't demand respect, you command it 😉 Chill pill in aisle 4 😀
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Seachange73
9 years ago
I'm quite bewildered why you seem so offended by some posters above who used 'big words '? I personally don't see what the big deal is as some people are more eloquent and articulate with their thoughts and ideas. And perhaps they seek the same. We are turned on with what we're turned on. so no point attacking people above. It makes you look bitter and judgemental. . Maybe the better and more mature way is just to state your preferences as per Op and move on. Ignore posts that bores you because some of us do love reading and exploring ideas and thoughts beyond the mundane. Thank you.
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Seachange73
9 years ago
Seduce my mind, the body will follow. Yes a definite alignment of mind, thoughts and interest will get me attracted and sustain my attention after checking out your guns and abs. Lol Many a times I have met physically great specimens of the male gender but did nothing to me. It felt like a shallow passing of ships. At this point in my life, I prefer some substance to the meet as time and energy seems more limited and truly precious. My mantra is that if I want to spend time with anyone or anything, it has to be intentional in the meet to create good memories and impressions so that I feel I.havent thrown away my precious time. The onus is on me to choose and be selective to meet people, for whatever reason - friendship, one offs, fwb or long term - to contribute to my personal growth, not hinder it. With those that slipped the net, that in itself is a learning.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Nailed it with your comment 👍 I obviously meet much younger guys, 20's and 30's, but guys in their 20's I love because life or pretention associated with career/money, but not limited to, usually hasn't started to get in the way of raw basic sexual desire and acting that out. Truly sexual people with leave their briefcase in the office and the people are very different, or if there is no briefcase, a 6 pack stashed under the seat to chill in your high vis, or the guy who doesn't have a job. Slightly veering off topic, but I made a conscious choice, or more a brain shift, when I first started doing this, that the type of car they drove, suburb they lived in, clothes they wore, occupation, the list goes on, but none of that reflects the sexual person and the person within, and thank God I changed my once stuck up opinions and prejudices. I couldn't begin to describe in a forum post how that decision changed my sex life/life, for the better, that's an understatement. I've been picked up in old bomby cars lol love it, one guy would always be wearing a very average looking pair of boardies, did I care? Hell no, in fact he'd lost his license when I first started seeing him. I'd go and pick him up, never worried me, that changed when he got his license back. I knew what he was about to do for me, that's all I cared about. I have to ask though, do people actually talk about politics? That would be a very big resounding NO from me, not unless I'm asking you to 'please explain' how you make me feel like I'm the luckiest woman on the planet 😘
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RHP User
9 years ago
You need to be more 'eloquent' hahaha pmsl 😂😂 Me too apparently. Wanna sneak out of your rocket science class and meet me behind the shopping centre? 😉😉😉 Hang on, I heard a murmur. What was that you ask? There is no rocket science class? Of course there's not, aerospace engineering or whatever, but you see if you cared, if you had to ask, you and I would never be naked together, whole world apart, I couldn't think of anything worse than pretention, huge big NO from me lol
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RHP User
9 years ago
To us conversation is very important. IOHO a good conversation is when all parties can take part and feel comfortable. As people feel more comfortable the boundaries can expand. To usflirting is a huge turn on. When you first meet new people its very hard to straight away touch their bodies but you can start touching their minds from the first hello
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RHP User
9 years ago
This quoted. You say "For me, this means that the person needs to at least demonstrate an interest and an understanding in my favourite subjects, eg. Economics, Finance, Metaphysics, Esotericism, Health, Alternative Health Therapies, Science, Geography, Food and Nutrition, Current Affairs and Conspiracy Theories" That's pretentious, no matter how you look at it 😃 it sounds like a job application 😏
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RHP User
9 years ago
Very intelligent people (superior intelligence I'm referring to) are usually socially awkward, in my experience anyway
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RHP User
9 years ago
Hogging but I don't care, there are things I am having pop into my head lol I think this topic alone, without looking elsewhere, has demonstrated how pretentious some people can be and what a turn off that is for others, each are happy in their respective corners, but never the two shall meet 😃
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RHP User
9 years ago
There is no formula, I can be very stimulated by pure lust. To just have sex with someone lust and animal magnetism rock. Yep sure animated conversation and commonality are great but that can be platonic too, great sex needs lust, my god your gorgeous let's get naked lust ! Doesn't matter how high the IQ if the inner animal is dead, so is the sex.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Before.after during sex "So babe,wadda ya think about Tony's budgies,Donald's wig and orange tan,Vlads muscles and shirt front,Julie's Armanis and Julia's jackets ? " :) Q
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RHP User
9 years ago
I feel your last comment was a little harsh and I understand your emotional strings have been pulled but there are so many people from so many walks of life that we can never tell what is pretentious here or not. Hell, as you are a forum regular you will clearly see pretentiousness can be read in all topics and in all sorts of ways but that does not make it so. Just our perception until we meet someone face to face to be able to make better judgement and even then possibly make the wrong one hahaha. Love your honest and true to yourself work my friend. Cheers
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Seachange73
9 years ago
Are people without their filter and control over their thoughts who are disrespectful to the OP and the people who just stated their thoughts and preferences. Continuous trolling for a fight without provocation shows more about you than the people you atrack. So sad. Shame that such a good thread is going south due to a few lacking in attention. manners are important. My apologies Op. I'm out. Good topic Q.
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Aww cmon now... I really couldnt care less if you bite or not . That's up to you . I half expected that a war and peace monologue would follow. If you care to scroll back , everything I wanted to say I said in in a few simple sentences. Why , because it is possible to relay something without dragging almost every second word out of the English dictionary .. I need to thank you for highlighting everything you took exception to , it only bought attention to what I wanted to say all over again , thank you.. Goes to show , you don't have to say much to make yourself heard.. That's because I have nothing to prove, what you see is what you get.. If you want a personal resume on what I've achieved in my life , I'm happy to provide it for you in private , it might surprise you..
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RHP User
9 years ago
I don't have a whole lot of free time in my life, and I'm pretty introverted, so I'm quite careful about who I spend time with. I enjoy having my mind stimulated, and love sharing conversations about the things that I'm passionate about. I'm unapologetically a lefty, with a strong sense of social justice, and a heavily developed geek streak. I have always loved politics, superheroes, and books, so someone who can talk about those with me make me happy. I'm turned on by intelligence, and value respectful and engaging discussions about a wide variety of topics. Having said that, I have a pretty encompassing view of what constitutes intelligence. It's not about the size of your vocabulary (although words do make me drool), nor the amount of degree notations after your name, but about the depth and breadth of your ideas, and your willingness to consider other points of view.
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Chaucer
9 years ago
I know I will struggle to hold a coherent conversation at the M&G; between being in awe of the beautiful people, and being brain addled from too much study for my uni exams that start 2 days after the M&G. Chaucer - Posted from rhpmobile
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Genius_Ironman
9 years ago
Having been active in Mensa circles AND sites like this for several decades, I have had the opportunity to compare sex with freakishly smart individuals and more average ones. For me, the more IQ points the better. Even for a quick night of conversation free sex, the difference is quite striking. YMMV.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'SoftandCurious' Before you fuck my body is something I say often. But that sounds extremely intense and complicated and it's really not. I'm a sapiosexual too. I'm an over thinker, a dreamer, a inquirer, a lover. Pique my interest. It could be that we can talk until all hours and endlessly about a large range of topics. It could be that you capture my inquisitive side or that your sense of humour and wit are sexy AF. It's hard to explain because there is just that click. That banter that stretches beyond small talk. That flows freely, creates desire, sparks interest about that person and not their body. Perfect post Marry me
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RHP User
9 years ago
Armed with nine years of lower deck naval vocabulary training, I too am capable of short comms and prolific filth. That's child's play really. And, whilst there's a time and a place, it's seldom actually warranted, huh?).
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Yes , you're right ... Words can mean different things to different people. I honestly can't remember calling you sassy.. but I don't doubt it for a moment.. Usually when I call someone sassy I pick my mark because its usually said tongue in cheek.. I call 'Touch ' sassy and she just laughs ..
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Nice to know we're so eloquent .. Let's skip the formalities , wanna fuck ? 😍. 😛. 😂
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Apologies if things went a little off course.. funny how one persons opinion can open a can of worms...
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RHP User
9 years ago
Pot calling the kettle black. You do not get to tell me what to say, think or do. And back at you, you cannot command respect, and definitely not from me. We've established one thing already - there is nothing in common between us. Do I care about what you think about the stuff that turns me on? So what if it's like a job application? Surprise! I've met several men who can and do slip into engaging in conversations in topics I love effortlessly. Just because you and jayme can't do the same, it doesn't mean it's pretentious. It's extremely narcissistic to think that just because something doesn't interest you, and that you are incapable of pulling it off, therefore anyone who is passionate about it must be neurotic. The world doesn't revolve around your opinions. You boast about loving diversity and all that. Ha! Big delusional farce! Seriously, this is so ridiculous, let me frame it for you in simple point format : - OP started an interesting thread, - I answered her questions. - You and jayme decide it la di dah, pretentious, etc Pardon me for asking, but who asked for your opinion about what stimulates my mind?!!!
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RHP User
9 years ago
That's gold roflmao 😂😂😂 onlywantone - yes it was harsh, I've been full on busy the last week, sometimes I post in a hurry, however my point was there's a big difference between actually being intelligent, and feeling the need to appear more intelligent than you really are. People who are very intelligent, it's apparent when you're with them, of course, but they don't walk around spruking it to the world, they don't have to. I'm in contact with a guy at the moment, please don't panic if you are that guy and reading this, discretion always, but he is studying and pretty impressive what he is studying, he also tutors, his intelligence is sexy to me, but it never factors in when we're talking, our convo is always of a sexy nature, he is a sexual guy, kinky, whether he's a Rhode scholar or not, makes no difference re our connection except perhaps that he has the capacity to properly formulate our upcoming kinky meets, which I'm excited about. He's very curious, and very humble. Anyway, fair comment from you 😉
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RHP User
9 years ago
Wow... have you seriously read Chaucer? I had to study portions of The Canterbury Tales and it was initially tedious, but later became rather fascinating. :) I recall my mum flipping through Chaucer and exclaiming, "You read this?! Is it even English?!" Hehehe! Teens sometimes go through a stage where they might feel embarrassed of their parents, but I remember when mum corrected me and said, "Cygnets. Baby swans are called cygnets." I was so impressed by her, I was starstruck. =D I quietly accorded her Rock Star status then and told my BFF then about how smart my mum was! :) Mum was so well-read and both her and dad are very interested in current affairs although they don't quite share similar views sometimes and it quickly became entertaining hearing the hilarious verbal jousts. All in good fun! She was a fashionista too, something her nerdette daughter can't quite replicate. :P Here's an ode to all the men Who enjoy chats about apples to amen Words roll off their tongues And my clothes, they come undone And merrily we retreat to make nocturnal plans! =D
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RHP User
9 years ago
'you' was meant in a generic sense, not meaning you personally 😃
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RHP User
9 years ago
Raw intelligence need not require a long vocabulary, or a lot of technical knowledge in this area or that but, as PatchWorkGirl and Meander mentioned, there does need to be a willingness to engage with alternate ideas and opinions, and the intelligence to see things from other peoples point of view, to try to understand their position rather than just tear it apart. By it's very definition, a "bigot" is not someone who holds certain positions on certain topics, it's a person who simply will not talk to people who disagree with them, and has no criteria by which they might consider certain opinions wrong. Now because I am looking more to make friends with an openness to physical intimacy (note, not just sex, but even just sharing a shower, a massage, and watching a few movies until falling asleep), an empty and purely physical exchange is not going to cut it. Additionally, I'm looking for people who are curious about most everything, and passionate about something. I find myself drawn to people who like to ask me about my academic specialties, and are looking to tell me the ins and outs about whatever it is that makes them feel alive, that they devote their free time to. So, for example, I am fairly conservative minded analytic philosopher, who enjoys writing and gaming in his spare time. Does this mean I couldn't be attracted to a liberally minded art teacher who enjoys dancing and horse riding in her spare time? Not at all. As long as she's willing to dissect my political opinions with interest, and allow me to do the same to her, show a passing interest in my work, and help me understand what it is she loves about hers, and not try to take away from my hobby times, and still enjoy hers. Again, brilliant OP. And thanks to those who have given some charitable and thoughtful answers.
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AnnieWhichway
9 years ago
I'm not highly educated but I believe l have received an education called street smart in my younger years. It taught me one thing. Intelligence and personality are not directly related. You can have either and can also have both. I'll take personality to bed any night, intelligence can wait outside.......
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RHP User
9 years ago
"Willingness to consider other points of view" Brilliant, just going to borrow that if you don't mind. I'll bring it back when I'm done 😉 Major eye roll, not for you patchwork girl but yeah I'll have to stop there. Bring it back in a sec 😇
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Dirtyandfriendly
9 years ago
It depends on what I'm looking for, if I'm just after a spontaneous encounter the less talk the better (besides dirty talk). I don't really care what we talk about as long as it's a two way street. Some people I've met go either way they can't converse or they converse so much I can't wait to make an exit. It all depends on what turns you on in a person and what you need to get going.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I think that you need that mental stimulation to create true passion. I am not on here to meet people for sex for the sake of it. I want to experience great sex with passion and feeling and connecting with someone mind and body helps create that pleasure for all parties involved.
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RHP User
9 years ago
I remember chatting to you for quite a while at my first meet and greet, back when I was a shy young thing. You were lovely, and engaging, and indulged me as I went off on a rant about a book I was particularly hating at the time, if I remember correctly (although, I must say, I -was- a little drunk). Anyone who gets to chat to you at the M&G will be lucky indeed.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Can be different for each person. For some, it can be a certain level of intellectual conversation which gets their juices flowing in the thinking department. For others, it can just be chatting about everything and anything where the conversation flows in different tangents and the subject is changing every two minutes. For me, it's about someone who I'm comfortable with enough to talk to about anything and everything. Someone who can listen to the ramblings going on in my head and I'm comfortable enough to just speak my mind (the crazy ramblings that keep busy in there). If we're both not comfortable enough to just ease back and let the contents of our mind flow, then there's no level of physical stimulation happening.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Great discussion, folks. This post is more about education than intelligence (yes, as many of you have noted, there's little correlation. Some would say an inverse relationship!) We've always been tickled to know if there are other Post grads on RHP though. NOT because we suspect they're smarter, but just for that shared special interest, or is it commiseration, kick :-) What's not to love about sexy nerds, though?
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RHP User
9 years ago
If you know what MEPBPH means then you're already a VIP with exclusive access - Posted from rhpmobile
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Seachange73
9 years ago
I think it just got included in to the banned substance list. 😄 Al kan not get why I need to know this to get into your VIP club. 😝
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'scienceisgolden' If you know what MEPBPH means then you're already a VIP with exclusive access - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
But google is smarter.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'lilyorchid' I think it just got included in to the banned substance list. 😄 Al kan not get why I need to know this to get into your VIP club. 😝 King Crab Appendages Are Savory Eats!
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RHP User
9 years ago
One doesn't need to know OOOTTAFVGVAH to turn me on... he just needs the right pheromones! =D Doncha just love science? There are Biology practicals where I can study your body whilst you study mine. I'll oblige with all sorts of positions and hope the man will be accommodating too. There's Chemistry where we can investigate the catalysts that cause cataclysmic involuntary shudderings of the sexual organs that precede sudden releases of endorphins but not before triggering a cascade of chemical reactions that are very pleasurable to both sexes. And then there's Physics... the mechanics of positioning, harnessing the forces of thrusting and resisting, maximising good friction, and of course there's the very useful study of how to tie a rope to safely suspend a body. The Science of Sex! Totally engrossing! =D
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RHP User
9 years ago
...is often the start of what may become a journey together. We do not have to agree on everything or like the way we individually peel garlic however the ability to communicate, the ''whats, whys and hows'' is essential. Don't overlook the other two of the big three... physical and emotion lock in with mental. Sometimes not equally balanced but even in disproportion make the world spin, at least for me. Without those characteristics...it's not much different than mutual masturbation sans the benefits of alliteration. CM
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RHP User
9 years ago
Yes, stimulating yet relaxed light hearted conversation with a great sense of humour is a great turn-on. On the other hand spending time with someone who think they are an authority on every topic is a massive downer..... not in a good way 😉. Also, nothing beats good listening skills. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
You make me hot for teacher. Do you need a willing student? I've had a couple of women say that my pheromones drove them wild lol - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
But it needs some curiousity and personality mixed with it. There is nothing sexier than a physical and mental exchange with an intelligent woman.
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RHP User
9 years ago
My god Naked Heart you are a woman of my own words, you have described to a tee exactly my take on mental stimulation. Thank you, so many people just don't get it! x - Posted from rhpmobile
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JoeNorth
9 years ago
Although I worry that if I put any details in my profile about my estimation of how intelligent and funny I can be (very and very - see it sounds like I'm a conceited dickhead), what my likes and dislikes, my beliefs and principles, etc, and how I look for similar in a woman, they will be turned off because I sound like a, well, conceited dickhead.
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JoeNorth
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' I need someone I click with mentally, which means we are at a similar level smarts wise and we share the same interests and sense of humour, as well as other views I value (religion, politics, animal welfare, etc) I'm looking for ongoing trysts rather than one-off encounters, and I couldn't continue to be attracted to someone I didn't find interesting, funny, or of a similar mindset (at least to some extend) as myself. Not looking for my twin, nor the ideal man, but someone who "fits" me, if you will. Hope that makes sense. Although I worry that if I put any details in my profile about my estimation of how intelligent and funny I can be (very and very - see it sounds like I'm a conceited dickhead), what my likes and dislikes, my beliefs and principles, etc, and how I look for similar in a woman, they will be turned off because I sound like a, well, conceited dickhead.
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Have2befun
9 years ago
I the male half are attracted to those who know who they are but also to those who will listen and return factual debate and are inquisitive to know more. I can't stand ignorant people who do not care for truths. If you don't know why all your commerial contracts label you as a all capital name (Capitis Diminutio Maxima) and you accept that name as being you. Then you won't comprehend who you really are. You have much to learn of who you really are. Most people would not have a clue what I just stated, the ignorant people will just quickly say wtf is he talking about, those interested will possibly look up say Blacks Law Dictionary on the meaning of that weird word and possibly ask questions and want to know more or just further research more on the subject. Those who know what I stated and comprehend it, will connect and debate it. Its in your best interest to know who you are. In stating that I still prefer a balance in mind stimilation of intelligence and physical sexiness. I would still be as interested in people who are not of average to high intelligence as long as they are not ignorant and rude, and are a pleasure to be around. Don't have time for rude, ignorant people even if they are very intelligent and physically sexy. My lovely female half who is snoring her head off next to me lol, is more happy go lucky, can connect with anyone who she finds attractive and knows they have a good heart, interlect doesn't bother her, she has time for anyone who is of good nature. She also won't tolerate rude agressive nasty people like most of us won't. In a nut shell what floats our boat. Anyone who we find attractive who is not rude or ignorant, can communicate, enjoys themselves, involves themselves in communication and physical fun, non sexual and sexual. Thats just not all about sex.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Call me ignorant, but I loathe pretentious people 😉
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RHP User
9 years ago
when someone states quite rudely and ignorantly, that they can't stand rude and ignorant people lol bit like the time waster declarations within profiles 😏 Shuffle along to the next 👣
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RHP User
9 years ago
Intellect :) Q
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RHP User
9 years ago
Intelligence, not ignorance or arrogance. Not every person can know every thing but some decent common knowledge and the awareness and curiosity to go into topics a bit deeper. Asking what the score of the recent football/cricket or other sport match was would be an instant failure. Unless you were asking about the new design or F1 cars then you might be getting somewhere... - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'PKDK69'...If you don't know why all your commerial contracts label you as a all capital name (Capitis Diminutio Maxima)... Are you amongst those responsible for Malcolm Roberts (aka "Malcolm-Ieuan: Roberts., the living soul", representing a corporate entity he terms MALCOLM IEUAN ROBERTS) to the Australian Senate? On one hand, Roberts stands as strong counter-argument to the case for democracy. On the other hand, if that box of hammers can be elected, there remains great hope for the electoral chances of vast numbers of apparently sentient beings who aspire to public office, but also had not the great fortune of a privileged upbringing.
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Have2befun
9 years ago
@ontology Well stated and finding this balance in a corporate controlled world to position oneselve into position to correct the deception we are bonded slaves to. There are many more behind the scenes working on these very things Malcolm Roberts is attempting. There's a mighty well organised establishment that is taking our wealth. With some very dark future plans if people like Malcolm Roberts can not prevent it. - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'Qefenta1' Intellect :) Q I noticed that spelling error too Q.
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Have2befun
9 years ago
All i can say is not directly connected. Said too much already, will just leave it at that.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Malcolm Roberts. I feel sorry for the gullible, but the wilfully ignorant get no sympathy from me.
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'I_touch_myself2' when someone states quite rudely and ignorantly, that they can't stand rude and ignorant people lol bit like the time waster declarations within profiles 😏 Shuffle along to the next 👣 Oh you pretentious woman, how dare you to defy the one truth! or is it rather: Good Gal! You dare to defy the one truth?
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RHP User
9 years ago
Haha I defy a lot of things, logic comes to mind 😀 the laws of physics, defy the odds 😉 Defy is a good word 😄
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RHP User
9 years ago
to defy gravity, I stress try 😊
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RHP User
9 years ago
Quoting 'vampavibe' Quoting 'Qefenta1' Intellect :) Q I noticed that spelling error too Q. Typo? Peachy ;-)
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RHP User
9 years ago
The thing that keeps leaping most to mind when I consider answering this thread Q is how RHP never satisfied that earliest temptation that physical presence did in the first place. I take it on in a similar way to impromptu parties maybe. So much more fun, too much planning takes the anticipation out of for me. I'll never forget those days after that first temptation and before finding RHP. Personal adds in the paper will always have a personal meaning lol. That doesn't mean some minds might not be appealing to me though I suppose... Peachy
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RHP User
9 years ago
The science of beening? ...The nature of beening? 🤔 Fuck me!! Now thats a conversation that infinite! Hasn't RHP come a long way 😂 Soon we'll all have to get a PHd in sexual behavior before beening allowed to join!! hahaha. Different strokes, different folks, we get it! Please.....don't overanalysis this? If you feel threatened intellectually, don't. Your forked tongue will be met with silence. 😎
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RHP User
9 years ago
Wow great reading!! These forums are by far the best part of RHP!!! Guess I will stick around awhile longer (new to internet dating and no luck so far as all the men just want a quick root, something I cant do so discouraged).Maybe getting to know someone via the forums first is the way to go to find a man who actually wants to get to know a woman for her mind and personality before her body. I'm wondering men (& women for that matter) out there who like multiple casual hookups (but not sure if you read the forums as someone else mentioned)- doesn't having casual flings 'get old' eventually? Doesn't everyone want deep down to feel a connection; to feel liked and valued for who they are? I suspect men who are able to go from woman to woman are either shut down emotionally or simply have no respect for women...and/or it is just an age thing with the young guys. All about fun and that's okay, each to their own. If you like the mind and who they are as a person then there will still be some element of attraction years to come if you stick around with that person...but yes I know many men will just go onto the next woman if they lose interest in the previous one. It's a shame. Not to mention what a waste when you see someone hot and find out they only want a one night stand and that is not who you are/something you can do...oh well their loss I say! But I wish I could just have random sex with someone, probably have alot more fun without stressing "Does he like me for me?" So in some ways I envy women who can do it. I guess I am old fashioned, I like the slow burn of seduction, a gradual buildup of intensity of sexual tension...then when it happens it is off the charts! Peony you are an intelligent and fascinating woman, I like what you had to say. Question for men out there---I am curious what it is that makes men WANT TO get to know a woman intellectually vs men who want to just have multiple flings... is it how you were raised, ie to respect or not respect women? What makes you want to stick around? Make a quick exit? Cheat on a partner? Can a man in a relationship who has a high sex drive be happy with just 1 partner /practice monogamy? It seems most men I /women like me who want something long term meet out in the world who are attracted will either only want a fling or will say whatever we want to hear but play around behind your back or have sex with you once or a few times (under the guise yes babe we are dating/in a relationship), then they announce it's over, see ya later. Or maybe that's just been my experience. I believe I have had only 1 relationship where he didn't cheat, it lasted many years and we loved one another but sadly it didn't work out in the end.
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Sawadee
9 years ago
Wipes hands... Hopefully the pretentious few have now satisfied their ego's . Beating one's chest is not a good look no matter if you're educated or not.. As someone stated in another post , pretty soon we will need to sit for a Ph.D. just to meet the opposite sex for something that should come naturally.. But now , at least we got to know who's who and who we should avoid .
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RHP User
9 years ago
Me at hello, Qefenta. I definitely get the two edged sword thing, humour has cost me many a good night. I love it when a lady gets my lines and delivers it back in spaces. Doesn't mean I'm going to take them home.......that night.
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RHP User
9 years ago
"...Or do you get turned off by someone who exhibits far too many smarts?" More like I get turned off by someone who exhibits too many stupids!
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Sawadee
9 years ago
If you're smart , you don't need to exhibit anything.. Unless of course you feel your not getting noticed any other way.?
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RHP User
9 years ago
Loved reading this thread. Dont have anything to add. Just reminds me of Schrödinger's cat (or double slit experiment); if you measure it, it will be gone. Although if you dont, you will never know . - Posted from rhpmobile
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JoeNorth
9 years ago
Quoting 'Meander' Apart from the first sentence (that I had to read three times before I got it), I think your profile is great! Thanks, but I got rid of most of it because it feels odd writing about myself. I usually let my, well, my 'talking' do the talking when I meet people in person. I'm still newish to this site, and I've got a lot to learn about online profiles.
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RHP User
9 years ago
When I was single I was looking for regular playmates/friends who I could converse with. One weekend I was staying in. I had a text from a 52 year old, "Like to catch up?" I told him he couldnt come to mine as my son was at home so no. He said, "Ok another time" So obviously after a no strings root. Later, another text from a 30 year old Id been talking to. Told him the same, and he said, No problem, Ill come and pick you up and well go out for dinner. Had dinner and a good chat and then he dropped me off back home again. We remained friends. So dont give younger guys the brush off, you might find that they are more mentally stimulating and attentive than older guys. Not ALL older guys I might add, but there seems to be a stigma about younger guys not being good company. When I was single, just my experience, the guys who wanted to spend time with me and chat and enjoy my company were under 35.
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