T64
Ask Auntie..............
May 31 2015
Comments
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RHP User
11 years ago
My lover moved away and I can't find anyone to take his spot. I want a single man over 6ft, preferably sporting stubble, tats and Converse. Must live in Sydney and be a non-smoker.Oh and he must love animals. And have dry sense of humour. And have good grammar, and like to cuddle and it would be great if he was bi too. Am I asking too much? Love, Searching in Sydney x
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Relax but this might hurt a little. I can see problems here. Converse? Really? You are stuck in the past sweetie. You need a gent with a nice pair of Globes. They come in vast range of colors. Maybe even a color to compliment his attire but lets not turn this into a fantasy. Second glaring thing is Sydney. But that is an easy fix. Move to Melbourne. Cooler climate. They cuddle and spoon down here to keep warm which fits your requirements as well. And lots of nice shoes down here....... And after you move to Melbourne and if you still have trouble, you can hit me up. I fit your requirements to a tee. Even the stubble but only in the mornings......... Good luck in your search. Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
After reading your response to Searching in Sydney, I am worried that I may be stuck in the past. I wear my red Converse sneakers ALL THE TIME. Am I out of date? Please help! Love, Sneakily_Suspect
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Seachange73
11 years ago
Dear Auntie Annie Firstly, thank you very much for this much awaited and anticipated column. You complete me... Now my problems.... Part 1 I love sex but am very picky with the men I have sex with. I do get enough offers but I seem to want what I cant have. I have a couple of fwb but our schedules are not in synch as one works shift work and lives in the other side of town. So should I have more FWBs to increase my chance of realistic meeting? I am just redirecting all these sexual tension into my boxing and gym training... I want a real man to wrestle and tussle with me... Please advise... Part 2. I told myself I would not go there but I have a lovely time with a younger man in his 20s. Have I lost my mind or have I just loosen up my morals and boundaries?
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Seachange73
11 years ago
Quoting 'Astrild' After reading your response to Searching in Sydney, I am worried that I may be stuck in the past. I wear my red Converse sneakers ALL THE TIME. Am I out of date? Please help! Love, Sneakily_Suspect I am partial to a man in Red converse myself....
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
I fear your passion for the color red is clouding your judgement. You need to find those red boots you want to buy, ASAP. There seems to be a pattern forming with women in their 40's clinging to the past association of Converse. Get OVER it!! Its 2015 last time l checked. Personally my current favs are a red pair of Globes. And no, i dont work for the company. So my advice to you Ms Suspect, ditch the converse and slip on a comfy pair of 5 inch heels. Try a different color maybe but i have a feeling you will go for red. Then come over to my place for further therapy and I'll bring you up to the present with a reality check. Annie.xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Glad you wrote in. Appears you have more problems than you care to admit to.Lets deal with the 2 silent ones first. Problem 3. I need no further evidence to support my theory regarding women in their 40's and the suffixation of converse. 3 from 3. Get with the times, especially if you are dating a man in his 20's. I am sure he doesn't wear Converse. He probably sports a nice pair of Globes though. Problem 4. Is it any wonder that Amy no longer posts. Someone stole all her Emoticons. And it is very apparent who the thief is. Suggest you give them all back to her-if you have any left! Now back to the problems you have admitted to. Problem 1. Can one have too many FWB's? An age old question. I think you can never have too many. But the email box gets a little hard to sort with more than a dozen at a time. Perhaps round yourself out to 7? One for every night of the week if schedules work out. But you need to be careful with the gym nights. We don't want you starfishing it on them. Word could get back here that you dozed off after a boring session and then before you know it, no more FWB's. You will be banished from RHP as the starfish woman. And oh, if you need more FWS's, my schedule is very flexible. Just saying. Problem 2 . Mmmmm. A 20's lover. Congratulations firstly. But don't tell too many. Some are very judgmental in here. Just between you and me, a young man aged 18 hit me up the other day. I didn't say yes but worryingly, I left the door open and didn't say no. God, I can hear the keypads rattling as we speak. But no, I shan't be going there.........In answer to your problem, if you can get it and keep up, why not? Besides it does keep the mid life crisis that is obviously at your door, at bay. Good luck (and yes, I did keep one emoticon for myself) Annie xx
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tylannister
11 years ago
Dear Auntie Annie, A friend recently recommended I pick up some Globes to complement my wardrobe, saying that the women would be all over me with them. Instead, I'm finding when I go out that the women mistake them for Converse and then lose interest in me when they are not. While I spent years in Converse, they have lousy arch support. I like my Globes, but they seem to be turning the women away. Help! Flat-Footed in Fairbanks
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Seachange73
11 years ago
LOL. gold. ... hahaha
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RHP User
11 years ago
Hey Annie, for years now I have been struggling to cope with my persistent disagreement with Balloons. I don't understand their existence. Why would anyone want plastic sacks of breath as a symbol of joy and celebration.
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RHP User
11 years ago
First time writer.... Dear Auntie Annie, I seem to have a penchant for men who live no less than 1000km away from me. It's been a common theme throughout the past couple of years. There are plenty of lovely men in Perth, but I only seem to strike up meaningful friendships with men who live far far away from me. At first I thought it was just the luck of the draw, but now I'm wondering if I'm doing it on purpose? Am I destined to spend my life in airports either waiting to jump on a plane or to jump on someone getting off one? Yours in antici...............pation KIS xxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
I know a lovely guy not living far from me, I do want to sleep with him however I feel sometimes it's just easier to take care of things myself how do I just let go and just start enjoying some delicious times 😊. Single-girl - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
We love MMF but we get too many messages from men under 40 who are hot to trot. We are male 64 and female 72. But we like younger men as well as other men of any age group. But we are just a bit nervous about such much younger men - even though we are very excited by the idea. Should we be so cautious?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Auntie annie - i am referring to men under 30!
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Its lucky i started this column. I wasnt aware of the huge footwear problem amongst us. I look at your age and the answer is there. Approaching 40. The women in their 40s seem to be retro inspired. Its up to people like yourself to update them to the present. Rescue them. Stick to your footwear of choice. They will see the light. And if that fails, date younger women. Late 20s, early 30s. They will appreciate your Globes straight up. I have heard of some insisting you wear them with nothing else in bed. Sometimes with white socks. Makes them go right off. Keep with your search and good luck. Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Yours is deep seated problem stemming from your childhood. You were one of those snotty nose kids at the amusement park who insisted on having their balloons to hang onto. And ultimately, they burst and both frightened you and upset you at losing your ballon. And now, you have the phobia and require the validation of very large breasted women. It will take time to overcome but you are young so there is hope. First step is to buy a oair of Globe shoes to trick your mind off the original globophobia. Its a word thing. Trust me. A red pair will work best. Good luck Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Yours is a problem usually associated with men. A fear of committment. By choosing partners in far away places reduces the chances of the committment question. Too far you will say. You have your space you retreat to when you head home or bundle them off at the airport. You need to tackle this gradually. You need to get used to having a man around more. First and most important. Get a spring for the toilet seat so it springs up when not being used. Get some mens socks and undies. Throw them into the corner of the bedroom and bathroom and keave them there. Throw some wet towels on the floor of the bathroom and leave them there. Leave some beer bottle tops on the kitchen bench And empty beer bottles beside the couch. In no time you will be accustomed to having a man around full time and you may be able to just use the railway system for youf meets. You are a 40s girl, is there any issue with footwear starting with C? Could be a complex association with Committment and Converse? Good luck Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
God, you're not giving me much......... First thing that strikes me is your profile piccy.Lonely beach, perhaps memories of walking hand in hand down that romantic strip of sand. Your lonely legs sticking out, needing caressing and fondling by the man missing from your life. I think the quick fix would be to ditch that piccy. Because you see it every day you are online. Reminding you of days gone by and then you dream about him. So you need to put up a nice nudie shot of yourself. Or perhaps a nice arse shot in a sexy pair of G strings. 6 inch heels, not much on. I can help you with this one. Email me a vast array of such shots and I will have a perve....er.. a look and let you know which one to put up. The second thing that may be irrelevant. You are a woman in her 40's........ Is there a chance your lost lover wore a certain brand of footwear? Perhaps we wont go there...... Good luck and I'll await your photos Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh damn, I have three pairs of Converse but also four pairs of over the knee and five pairs of knee high boots. Do they outweigh my terrible taste in sneakers?
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
3 pair Converse? Good griefBut I am swayed by 4 pair of over the knee........I'm still searching for my first pair. You may have to email some photos of you wearing the over knee ones so I can pass judgement. But dont cloud the photos with clothes...........make them simple. In the meantime, if you can afford that many pair of boots, you can ditch the Converse and buy a nice pair of Globes.... Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Dear Annie, Recently i have msged a few rhp members and there responses have been, "oh you're that guy on the forums!"I think i have reached RHP VIP status. How do i deal with my new found status? Regards, Vip
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Lay down sweets.This is going to sting.I see that you are treating the comments as a compliment. A positive?On a previous post I did say that for the week and a bit that I have been seeing your posts that you have been like a bull at a gate and occasionally missing the gate and entering the china shop next to it.Can I just say that this is not a good thing.You need to settle into your spot.You need to stay off the red cordialYou need to settle, petal. To survive in here you do not want to be known as the "the guy in the forums"You need to show respect and if there is such a thing as VIP status (which there is not) it would be something earnt and not snatched off the mantel piece whilst trashing the place. One other thing. I sincerely hope you do not own a pair of Globes............ Calm down and relaxGood luckAnnie xx
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Seachange73
11 years ago
I rarely get fussed with things and take things in stride. However, lately, I read posts from a character (shall remain unnamed) on RHP forums who flaunts his 'conquests' of young women, no, girls as he refers to them at every opportunity. It makes me feel like regurgitating my breakfast everytime and in fits of uncontrollable laughter. Strange affliction. I hesitate to read his posts nowadays but like a trainwreck, I couldn't avert my eyes. I am mesmerized by the insanity. At times, the very image of him and the girls cavorting or him being the 'squirt bucket' make me break in beady sweat and hives, in a very bad way... no amount of Antihistamine nor antibiotics can cure this mental picture of him lording over the squirting gals in some random dogging mountain or nightclub in Perth... My GP has recommended to put on my Dom-wannabe-resistantant blinkers on but to no avail... I believe I am an addict to his subliminal love-whispers to us... Is he the sexual messiah that has come down the Dogging mountain of Perth? Is he the true Pussy Whisperer we are all seeking? Please advise. So-Confused-Non-squirterXxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Any_Whichway' Lay down sweets.This is going to sting.I see that you are treating the comments as a compliment. A positive?On a previous post I did say that for the week and a bit that I have been seeing your posts that you have been like a bull at a gate and occasionally missing the gate and entering the china shop next to it.Can I just say that this is not a good thing.You need to settle into your spot.You need to stay off the red cordialYou need to settle, petal. To survive in here you do not want to be known as the "the guy in the forums"You need to show respect and if there is such a thing as VIP status (which there is not) it would be something earnt and not snatched off the mantel piece whilst trashing the place. One other thing. I sincerely hope you do not own a pair of Globes............ Calm down and relaxGood luckAnnie xx Dear Annie, That is the worst response ever!!!!! And while laying down you touched my genitals! Thats inappropriate!! hahaha And for your information, i have a date that came out of VIP status. Up yours annie hahahaah :)
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Hottie1
11 years ago
Why can't some men kiss for shit. Why is kissing such a big deal for some blokes? It's a deal breaker for me. Pash challenged Mary 😘 xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thank you Auntie Annie for your fantastic advice. I intend to hit the shops to find a pair of red boots/comfy 5 inch heels/Globes just as soon as I return to civilisation on Thursday. Although Im not entirely sure Perth can actually be considered civilisation. But that's a whole other topic :) Looking forward to coming over to your place for further therapy. Maybe we can discuss my spiral perm issues at the same time? Much love, Sneakily_Suspect (aka The Poodle)
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
First up, there are 2 topics that I will not go near. 1- Squirting and 2- Multiple Screaming Orgasms.The reasons have clearly been covered elsewhere...... I know of whom you speak. We can be grateful that there are a couple of thousand kilometers of distance that can make us feel safe from his clutches. But what if you were to travel to this distant land (which you will be soon)? You may feel the inclination to search for his nondescript triple fronted brick veneeer abode and knock upon the door. I have visions of the Adams family house inside for some reason. The sight of Lurch appearing to take your coat and show you to the dungeon. Row upon row of fucking machines lined up with all these young girls restrained to in the middle of puddles.Feel safe though Non-Squirter. I would say you are too old to share the benefits of such a setup. I know that may hurt but it is for your own good. It's so you don't set out on your quest to become a squirter under his care. For surely there is a chance you will never be seen again. To disappear in your own puddle. then become but a bump in the back yard beneath the lemon tree.To answer your question as to whether he is the Pussy Whisperer you all seek?PMSL. Then I shiver all the way down my spine..... Keep searching Confused, he is not the ONE..... Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Not a question but a thank you for giving a reason to wake up to the world each day with your wonderful and insightful agony aunt column . Anonymous
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Seachange73
11 years ago
You are nothing but a auntie Annie groupie! !! Welcome to the club. Lol
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RHP User
11 years ago
I will try to get out of just the groupie status (though it will be hard) and post a question soon enough no doubt
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Can i make you feel better by saying your sufferance is not alone. I haven't had a woman that hasn't wanted to pash. And they have all done it well. Now men, thats a different story. I have presumed that perhaps its because i was a tranny and that kissing a guy was a bit weird. Their reasoning though? Cant kiss me but certainly sucking my cock was fine. Go figure so that theory is out the window. So we thereby confirm that its not me or you, its them. Fear of intimacy? Its okay to fuck but not kiss...... And if they do kiss, its clumsy, too sloppy, too tonguey. Blah. I have no answer for you Mary. Its one of the non wonders of the world. They are out there though. If you have trouble finding them, you're welcome to come around....... As an afterthought. These men that didnt pash or were crap at it, did you notice what sort of sneakers they wore? And yourself, being a 40s woman once again, you have a passion for Converse? Just a little research I'm doing.... A big pash for you Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Your welcome. Now i just need to work out who you could be? Mmmmm. 40s guy. Wonder what brand of sneakers... Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Good luck on your date. Maybe a root is what you need.... We all have our fingers crossed!
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RHP User
11 years ago
Quoting 'Any_Whichway' Good luck on your date. Maybe a root is what you need.... We all have our fingers crossed! Now that response is better! haha
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RHP User
11 years ago
*Points at thigh-highs* Been wearing these all day, and still no lover! Am I too inpatient or is there no one out there for me to knock boots with?
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
You're teasing Auntie Annie now. Ill knock boots with you anyday. But my boots all pale into insignificance compared to those. Im sure you turned more than a few heads though. And significantly more than if you had your Converse sneakers on
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Hottie1
11 years ago
Any ... I'd pash you for hours! Thank you for the advice, a problem shared is a problem halved! And no, I like my men in a decent dress shoe, no bloody converse here :) Mary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
You are the best. Mwah x
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RHP User
11 years ago
last night I went on a date, he didn't look me in the eyes once, I wasn't even wearing my red converse! Confused RR - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
In the last couple of years I have discovered the wonders of leggings, and now - weather permitting damn you Townsville - I love to cover my legs and arse with that tight, shiny goodness. However, this discovery has brought up a question that continues to haunt me, and indeed humankind in general. Given your worldly experience and vast knowledge I would very much like to hear your opinion on this most vexing of debates.... .... Are leggings actually pants???
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RHP User
11 years ago
From the luck dragon in leggings...
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RHP User
11 years ago
Shame about the fact im a smoker because im a tall guy with a fair amount of tattoos haha - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have a really big problem.I don't have a problem..I feel soo left out..Auntie can you help me or am I just a hopeless case ..signed Plain Jane from Bum Fuck Nowhere
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On_Safari
11 years ago
My issue, I am seeing someone who adores me and wants me to move in. My kid adores him, his Son adores both of us. You'd think with all this adoration it would be a "no brainer" right? Financially it benefits both of us but I don't like the Gold Coast, giving up my home in Brisbane or entering into something I honestly think is just going to end badly. A gypsy told me there would be 3 men, the first is gone, the second was a short termer around 8mths and then there'd be a 3rd who is my match. I keep thinking this one is the short termer and I don't want to hurt him. Am I deluding myself out of a potentially good thing or am I just feeling "geographically challenged"? A'wonderin' Wanderer
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MsJonesy
11 years ago
I'm a little worried about someone I know who is a pretty awesome person but is starting to exhibit some worrying thought patterns. They seem to be developing a fixation about sneakers. A burning hatred for one brand and waxing lyrical about another. It comes up in chats all the bloody time. I mean we all have favorite things, but this is getting to the point where it's putting me off ANY brand of sneakers! Should we have a quiet word... or maybe hold an intervention?
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ever since I was taught the proper, I've been sqirting and gushing and flooding all over the place. The curtains are damp, the carpet squelches when I walk across the room, and the bed is like a cold wet kitchen sponge. What should I do?
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RHP User
11 years ago
I sent this to a lady as a conversation starter.....she didn't handle it at all well and got really personal about my pecker size....lol "Christ lady....you've got bigger arms than hulk hogan!!!" First question: what did I do to offend her?? Second question: I've never met the lady; so how did she know about my fascination with woodpeckers?? Is she psychic or just psycho?? 😝 - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
I come home from yoga and there's a whole page of questions. Be patient. Lucky theres nothing on tv tonight.......mmmmmm. tv. Thats me. ....
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'ana123' I know a lovely guy not living far from me, I do want to sleep with him however I feel sometimes it's just easier to take care of things myself how do I just let go and just start enjoying some delicious times 😊. Single-girl - Posted from rhpmobile Sorry for the late reply. Appears you got buried by the instant posters. Well firstly, remove the temptations. With that I mean you have to plan to run out of batteries for the old faithful beside the bed. No batteries, less temptation for the self love. Then, the hormones will begin to rise and rise until you get this incredible urge to throw caution to the wind and just go over to his house and pound on the door. When he answers just grab him by the back of the neck and lay a big pash on him for several moments. Then release and stare into his eyes with your puppy dog eyes. Either one of 2 things will then happen. Get back to me with what happens next. That will be your homework. Oh and to be safe, just stand a little back from the door line........ good luck and cant wait to hear part 2Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Oh thank you Any, at last someone who can answer all my questions! Don't those Chucks signify a mature man who may still be slightly bohemian with a healthy sense of individuality and confidence? But red bothers me, as do Globes on the older gent, like mature guys who drive red BMW's. Surely black converse are much more a statement? Yours, wasn't worried but now am ;) - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'VeryEroticCouple' We love MMF but we get too many messages from men under 40 who are hot to trot. We are male 64 and female 72. But we like younger men as well as other men of any age group. But we are just a bit nervous about such much younger men - even though we are very excited by the idea. Should we be so cautious? Auntie annie - i am referring to men under 30! Firstly, congratulations on being so sexually active for your age group. I am impressed. And I am treading carefully with this response because I do respect your sex drive and activities. Nothing wrong with mingling with the under 30's. It's only 30-40 year difference after all........? But I would be screening carefully. Very carefully. If things go pair shape on the night, it will leave scars for all parties concerned. So coffee meets first. Second meet should be over drinks I think and then take it from there. I think caution is your friend here. It can work. I have been hit up by some with up to 35 year difference but haven't taken the plunge and wont be. We are all different. I guess if all are comfortable then go for it.But I would not post the results on the forums. Wether positive or negative. You would cop some flak so dont even think about it Wish you luck Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Q. Out here standard dress is blundstones, khaki shorts and blue singlet top. No globes or converse in sight. When dressing for a date I do take a lot of time to choose the best, least worn blue singlet and shorts, and will use some shoe polish if needed on the blundstones. Is this enough for the ladies? Dear Annie: Do not take the above question seriously :)
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Rubenesque_Red' last night I went on a date, he didn't look me in the eyes once, I wasn't even wearing my red converse! Confused RR - Posted from rhpmobile But you most likely had your red bra on with a very plunging cleavage. Is it any wonder he didn't look you in the eye. He would have blushed so hard he would have ended up the same shade as your bra.Put yourself in his situation. If he had forgotten to zip up after a visit to the men's room and you could clearly see the outline in a tight pair of jocks as the zip parted when he sat opposite, where would you eyes wander?I know where mine would be. I'd be getting a little toey and perhaps not interested in the mantlepiece and perhaps daydreaming away and getting a little hard..........No problem here miss. And I know that was your intention all along as you carefully selected your blouse to frame the attraction. No fooling me. I have a female mind. Nice job...... Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Luck_Dragon' In the last couple of years I have discovered the wonders of leggings, and now - weather permitting damn you Townsville - I love to cover my legs and arse with that tight, shiny goodness. However, this discovery has brought up a question that continues to haunt me, and indeed humankind in general. Given your worldly experience and vast knowledge I would very much like to hear your opinion on this most vexing of debates.... .... Are leggings actually pants??? Sweets. A topic close to my heart. Leggings. I would love to go through your legging drawer. Wouldn't say no to your undie drawer either. Just joking......Did you want my female answer or my companion's answer (male)? Leggings can be pants. Its all in the interpretation..........well lets be honest with each other here. It's just relevant to the amount of camel toe that is put on display. A nice lip outline can be very flattering and attention gathering. And let's not leave out the rear view. A nice arse hugged by the shiny material. And again lets be honest here. On the grands scale of rating arses, a proper presentation in leggings where the material really rides up into the crack can be worth a couple of extra points for presentation. So many nice arses are let down by inadequate presentation. There has been many an arse that would be a 9 or even a 10 in the nude, sadly can be downscored by inadequate crutch rise. (man talk) Whereas, a less spectacular model which may score a 7 or 8 can be upscored to a 9 or 10 purely by the interest gained in the view where the material clearly hugs that canyon all the way through to the crutch. A nice gap through the crutch well........... talking 10's..... Clearly the above paragraph was my male talking. So summarising. Women may not call them pants if they view yours whilst their man is in proximity. Men won't call them anything. they will just oogle. So no definitve answer here. Sorry. Just put em on because you can. Annie xxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Dear Annie, I am afflicted by tiny feet and I am forced to shop in the kids department. What sort of shoes should I wear ??? Recently a 5 year old suggested I purchase a pair of Tickle Me Elmo slippers. I have to admit they were comfy. Signed Fairy Feet
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Naughtyforty67
11 years ago
A cute pair of boots will do it every time & a hot jacket to complement the ensemble😝 sexy! Converse?? Please. So many sexy shoes out there xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Freya79' I have a really big problem.I don't have a problem..I feel soo left out..Auntie can you help me or am I just a hopeless case ..signed Plain Jane from Bum Fuck Nowhere Just think yourself lucky. A plain jane can go under the radar with ease. They draw no enemy fire and then they can pop up and shine when they need. I wish I was a plain jane. Can you imagine trying to go under the radar when you are 6'5" in heels. It dont work.........So don't be disheartened Plain Jane. Someones shortcomings are anothers fantasy. Play the cards you are dealt. And Bum Fuck Nowhere. I've had a few of those. But may just be a case of not knowing where I was at the time though. Although there are a couple of places in Queeensland that fit that description. Ive been there........... Good luck JaneAnnie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'On_Safari' My issue, I am seeing someone who adores me and wants me to move in. My kid adores him, his Son adores both of us. You'd think with all this adoration it would be a "no brainer" right? Financially it benefits both of us but I don't like the Gold Coast, giving up my home in Brisbane or entering into something I honestly think is just going to end badly. A gypsy told me there would be 3 men, the first is gone, the second was a short termer around 8mths and then there'd be a 3rd who is my match. I keep thinking this one is the short termer and I don't want to hurt him. Am I deluding myself out of a potentially good thing or am I just feeling "geographically challenged"? A'wonderin' Wanderer Well I wont dilly dally around for ya Wonderin. Will give you both barrels. True love will remove all hurdles. it would move mountains. You would do anything to be together if you are both feeling that love. If you aren't feeling that all is good, then it probably isn't. If it's just the location, then he could remove that by moving to you. And if he won't then...........Tread carefully there beautiful. Maybe give it some more time. Don't rush it. Love will let it happen slowly and at your pace. Be sure on all counts. It's hard for a relationship to work when all the boxes are ticked. If there are boxes not ticked at the crucial time, then you are behind the eight ball from the start.Hope that helps. Of course I am not a party to all details so.....Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'kissk' I'm a little worried about someone I know who is a pretty awesome person but is starting to exhibit some worrying thought patterns. They seem to be developing a fixation about sneakers. A burning hatred for one brand and waxing lyrical about another. It comes up in chats all the bloody time. I mean we all have favorite things, but this is getting to the point where it's putting me off ANY brand of sneakers! Should we have a quiet word... or maybe hold an intervention? hear ya. Consider it resolved. But an interesting point. The share price in Globe went up a few percentage points late today. My portfolio is looking gooood...... Thanks all for that.Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ze old faithful doesn't have batteries but will endeavour to leave him in the pantry for awhile 😪 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Ze old faithful doesn't have batteries but will endeavour to leave him in the pantry for awhile 😪 😉 - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'xeena' Ever since I was taught the proper, I've been sqirting and gushing and flooding all over the place. The curtains are damp, the carpet squelches when I walk across the room, and the bed is like a cold wet kitchen sponge. What should I do? I refuse to enter this subject but I will offer a solution. 2 words.Adult nappy.You need to be precise with cutting out the access hatch. You will need a man for that........Ask around here. Some gents are bound to be experts at this. Done properly, the nappy will absorb as fast as you can squirt.Another hard subject solved. Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'sir_stir' I sent this to a lady as a conversation starter.....she didn't handle it at all well and got really personal about my pecker size....lol "Christ lady....you've got bigger arms than hulk hogan!!!" First question: what did I do to offend her?? Second question: I've never met the lady; so how did she know about my fascination with woodpeckers?? Is she psychic or just psycho?? 😝 - Posted from rhpmobile I hear wedding bells.I expect an invite of course.Actually you sound like you've been married to each other for years. Good luck with the preparations Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
You crack me up... 👍👍
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RHP User
11 years ago
I am a 36year old single woman from SYD who likes to wear Asics running shoes - am i doomed to singledom for the rest of eternity because of my footwear choice?
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'countrytouch' Q. Out here standard dress is blundstones, khaki shorts and blue singlet top. No globes or converse in sight. When dressing for a date I do take a lot of time to choose the best, least worn blue singlet and shorts, and will use some shoe polish if needed on the blundstones. Is this enough for the ladies? Dear Annie: Do not take the above question seriously :) Dearie me. Shoe polish on the blundstones? There is a problem ready to happen. What are they going to think? They are going out with a deluded individual that scrapes the sheep shit off to put some nugget on. The only thing you use nugget for up your way is on your balls for your bucks night. I would have thought that thongs would have been the choice for a date up there. And you don't have to worry about being seen in the nude with your socks still on in the rush for the passion. Nothing worse. Nothing but socks. passion killer..........Yeah I know. Cold up there for just thongs. But you can warm the old feet up on her when you snuggle under the blankets.That really is something that I find gets them going off.............they just scream for it!! Good luck Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'KrissySYD' I am a 36year old single woman from SYD who likes to wear Asics running shoes - am i doomed to singledom for the rest of eternity because of my footwear choice? It's ok sweetie. Relax. It's just the people in the 40's. They like the retro Converse. You are on the cusp but Asics are not Converse. You are still cool..... I could get busted for touching this subject but you did ask. Psssst. Can I interest you in a nice pair of...........Fuck. Someones coming. I am out of here. I have caught up. I need to go to bed before another posting. 4 pages in one day.............. Night NightAnnie xxx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Looloo1' Oh thank you Any, at last someone who can answer all my questions! Don't those Chucks signify a mature man who may still be slightly bohemian with a healthy sense of individuality and confidence? But red bothers me, as do Globes on the older gent, like mature guys who drive red BMW's. Surely black converse are much more a statement? Yours, wasn't worried but now am ;) - Posted from rhpmobile Nearly missed your post. But Looloo, my male counterpart sports Globes in a few colors. Red, blue and Black. A pair for every occasion.And as a mature female by mind, i find the Converse a little......dated lets say. A bit like the grey gent driving the convertible with his black cap on, black converse on. Young in mind but ageing on the outside. Yes you should be worried. Get your stud to ditch the convos...... Shit, i just noticed your age. In your 40's.........Rest my case here..... Good luck Annie xxx Sorry Kissk...........they are outnumbering all the other age demographics on here
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RHP User
11 years ago
Thanks for the laughs, a great respite from the seriousness and superficiality of this site, grateful for the respite! You rock x - Posted from rhpmobile
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Lovinit28andKC72
11 years ago
Does my ass look big in this?????
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MissBishere
11 years ago
dear Annie I am looking for a man, a partner, a friend hopefully with benefits to do amazing kinky sexy things with as well as dinner, movies, couples clubs and swingers parties. Ideally he will be open minded an alpha male type sexually mature and experienced willing to build a level of trust willing and able to take the lead Are my expectations to high, am I asking to much? Is there something wrong with my profile? Did I use the right to? Please help! Sexually frustrated Missb
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Easy..... No my darling......but it does look very hot and sexy.... Annie xx
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Hottie1
11 years ago
Should I believe it when men say? 1. You are beautiful/stunning/pretty (insert synonym)2. You are a great kisser.3, You have great tits4. You have a great body5. You are fucking awesome at blowjobs! Or, You do know what to do with a cock?6. Your pussy is so tight (aka I'm going to blow, quickly) Could I be the perfect woman? Mary xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'fdom234' Dear Annie, I am afflicted by tiny feet and I am forced to shop in the kids department. What sort of shoes should I wear ??? Recently a 5 year old suggested I purchase a pair of Tickle Me Elmo slippers. I have to admit they were comfy. Signed Fairy Feet I have heard of kids department catering for certain adult things. Like "My first bra" as an example.Wondering if they have in the shoe department "My first Thigh High 6 inch platform cum fuck me boots"Might be worth asking.Or custom made heels although i read your profile you are adverse to heels but maybe you can get training stilettos? But you are lucky. You live in Victoria so a nice pair of Ugg boots should do nicely for 9 months of the year. Do you get many requests for school girl fantasies ? Nice pair of T Bar shoes in black shiny with white socks? A few ideas but it is early. I haven't had coffee.And the questions are not getting any easier I notice.And gee I have MissB to do next.......
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Naughtyforty67' A cute pair of boots will do it every time & a hot jacket to complement the ensemble😝 sexy! Converse?? Please. So many sexy shoes out there xx I so agree Miss Norty. Those boots of yours would look so much better draped over my shoulders than a pair of those...(not permitted to say the C or G word today)And your are not getting my coat........ Hope Mr Norty is well........ Have a nice dayAnnie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Gee woman. Not asking much are we? A very strong coffee and an examination of your profile. You may be scaring them off? Maybe keep some mystique. Keep some surprises in your kit. For instance, drop the fisting. They may have flashes that it could mean anal fisting on them. And if it is, thats okay. Just surprise them by rolling them over on the first date, spreading his cheeks and the next thing he knows is the refreshing feel of ky gell on the ring. Nothing better is there.?Can you visualise his smile as he realises the upcoming treat. A complete surprise that keeps things fresh in the new relationship. He'll be hooked. Same with the paddles and smacking. He'll never expect the cricket bat behind the door if you drop it from your profile. Sometimes less is more. Become the girl next door. Make them think its their idea when you lead them into the swingers club whilst holding the big tub of popcorn for the cinena. Just like the guys do. They never tell you up front that they are pussy whispers and will have you squirtjng at their slightest touch. Good luck Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
some days ago i bumped into a friend i have known and we both liked each other for the last 20 years. I spent a day and evening with her , She is single not into online dating and has not had sex for 12 months, she says shes happy and doesnot want sex or a relationship as her last over 2 years ago was not nice .however i know she is not as happy as she says , and she has very low selfesteem , and really in denial about this , she is good looking and cannot accept my opinion that she is in my eyes a sexy woman . So we get a bit friendly and talk about sex , and she tells me she will not take her clothes off when having sex !! Hmmm ! And proceeds to tell me she at 40 has never ! Yep never had an orgasm in her life , does not touch herself and has no absolutely no way she is even going to try ! Yuk no way she says like its disgusting ! She is very defensive and on edge, i am perplexed !! by the end of the nite she is in my arms as i want to show her what feeling and intimacy i have to share and she has never recieved i believe . Any compliments or positives i like i tell her she laughs it off and brushes away . Im not joking . The next nite i invite her to my place for dinner she wants to fuck me and i want to fuck her . But this i must discuss so i ask her if she has ever made love ? Cracks up says fuck off ! Im not joking ! She has never been loved nor made love i tell her that i would like to in the future if we want to give it ago ? Make love to her passionately naked together ! And she has gotta at least try and think about an orgasm she will discover herself with myself just to comfort her and show her its nothing to be ashamed of !! All hell brakes out within her fear , shame ! half hour later she is crying will not talk ! Will not look ! Will not Listen to anything i say ,as i beg her to just stop worrying , and try to hold her as we have been but she has blocked me out and says shes sorry ! For what ? She has done nothing wrong But i knew what was next after she left . Now im a fuck head Because i opened my soul to her and unleashed feelings she craves but never had but always wanted! to be loved . I am willing to commit to her my love if she wanted share ! Or i am willing to walk away with nothing to offer ! But i will not beg and she must change at least try to like herself . What the fuck do i do now ? - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
From where i sit, yes could all be true. Definetly great tits. And hot bod. Nice arse. All true. But....... Perfect woman? Lets not let it all turn to a rush of blood to the head. Steady there sister. I see no evidence that you own or have shares in a brewery, hotel or if you are from that side of town, a vineyard. Let's keep it real Mary. When you get these compliments you should just thank them and go fetch another coldie out the fridge as a genuine thankyou. Must be too early for me. That came from the male half obviously. Need more coffee. ..... Annie and the other half. Xxx
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RHP User
11 years ago
..... hun ... I think that you have opened Pandora's box ? ..... ..... Converse ... ? love the column ..... that's quite phallic ! ... lol Uly
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RHP User
11 years ago
Dear Auntie Annie I have been told that my kissing 'sucks ' ..... Im concerned that I am developing a phobia about it ? ... should I take lessons ? Mr Drool
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Seachange73
11 years ago
I think we are sleeping with the same guys as they say exactly the same in that order... sigh...* Duh!!! And here I thought I was unique and spethial... . Not happy Jane (shaking my carrot against the high heavens).
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Hottie1
11 years ago
I'm happy to share the dizzy heights of sex goddess with you. Mary xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
This cold windy weather had resulted in my skin being drier than a Nun's punanni. I am scaly and cracked like a lizard. Help! How do I get myself all moist and smooth again? Normal moisturizers are just not good enough?
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RHP User
11 years ago
First of all, love your work. Now down to business. I have a problem I need your advice on. I think back to some great times I had, really good times and totally enjoyed what was going on and went to bed totally satisfied, i could almost still taste it the next day. But is what I remember being so good last time going to tick the box again? Or will I be left unsatisfied wishing I made another decision. An opportunity has come up tonight and i need to be sure of what to do, i have eaten at this table before and loved it so will the same decision lead to the same result tonight? Please help, so what do you think, parmesan or mozzarella on the pasta tonight? Confused. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Meeka100' This cold windy weather had resulted in my skin being drier than a Nun's punanni. I am scaly and cracked like a lizard. Help! How do I get myself all moist and smooth again? Normal moisturizers are just not good enough? Would be easy to address the obvious problem wouldn't it. The dry skin.But let's delve deeper and get to the real reason behind your condition.Let's fix it at the source.You and l are both cum queens. And we know that is the secret to a good silky complexion.So its reasonable for me to conclude that you are not getting enough sex.And the reason you are not getting enough? Because you are from Sydney and you think its cold!It's not cold there. It's cool there. Its cold here.And because you think its cold, you don't feel like going out to clubs and meets and therefore no sex and therefore dry skin because you miss your faceful. So, you just need to harden up. Perhaps a winters weekend in Melbourne will make you appreciate your temperate climate when you get back. Solution. Put a scarf on and get out there. Soldier on and go harder..... And for an even better long term solution, I'll post my first beauty tip after this post for all the ladies out there. Good luckAnnie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Face Mask I can make my own but you ladies are behind the 8 ball there and are at the mercy of your studs or partners.But a bit of luck on your side will have you masking nightly. 1. collect your product. Empty the condoms into a little container with a lid. Even better if you can get your playmate or hubby to crank one or two out specially for it. 2. Store in fridge. Can keep for a couple of days if refrigerated. have a few pots running so you have a continuous supply 3. Nightly before retiring. Use an old foundation brush or similar. With smooth even strokes, apply over face and problem areas to achieve a light coating. Avoid the lip area as the constant desire to lick the lips can be a distraction. 4. Allow to set as you drift off to sleep. As an added bonus, the constant aroma of the product will invigorate your senses and make you have pleasant sexual dreams all night long. This will obviously spur your playmate to produce more samples when you wake him up early morning. A continuous cycle begins. 5. Rinse in morning and feel the difference. 6. If you attend gang bangs, your product supply will occasionally increase to a point where you can treat yourself to a very heavy coating. Applied correctly, you will be able to do a peel in the morning. As an added treat for your partners well being, the peel can be discretely soaked in his cereal. Therefore recycling to keep product supply constant. EnjoyAnnie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
Dear Aunty Annie, How we can we achieve world peace? - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
I realise this is Aunties column (thread) and comments are not really supposed to be posted but I just wish to say that is so very sad for you and her. I sincerely hope you get to show this lady how beautiful and important she truly is and your friendship stays strong. All the best my friend
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Bigocean' some days ago i bumped into a friend i have known and we both liked each other for the last 20 years. I spent a day and evening with her , She is single not into online dating and has not had sex for 12 months, she says shes happy and doesnot want sex or a relationship as her last over 2 years ago was not nice .however i know she is not as happy as she says , and she has very low selfesteem , and really in denial about this , she is good looking and cannot accept my opinion that she is in my eyes a sexy woman . So we get a bit friendly and talk about sex , and she tells me she will not take her clothes off when having sex !! Hmmm ! And proceeds to tell me she at 40 has never ! Yep never had an orgasm in her life , does not touch herself and has no absolutely no way she is even going to try ! Yuk no way she says like its disgusting ! She is very defensive and on edge, i am perplexed !! by the end of the nite she is in my arms as i want to show her what feeling and intimacy i have to share and she has never recieved i believe . Any compliments or positives i like i tell her she laughs it off and brushes away . Im not joking . The next nite i invite her to my place for dinner she wants to fuck me and i want to fuck her . But this i must discuss so i ask her if she has ever made love ? Cracks up says fuck off ! Im not joking ! She has never been loved nor made love i tell her that i would like to in the future if we want to give it ago ? Make love to her passionately naked together ! And she has gotta at least try and think about an orgasm she will discover herself with myself just to comfort her and show her its nothing to be ashamed of !! All hell brakes out within her fear , shame ! half hour later she is crying will not talk ! Will not look ! Will not Listen to anything i say ,as i beg her to just stop worrying , and try to hold her as we have been but she has blocked me out and says shes sorry ! For what ? She has done nothing wrong But i knew what was next after she left . Now im a fuck head Because i opened my soul to her and unleashed feelings she craves but never had but always wanted! to be loved . I am willing to commit to her my love if she wanted share ! Or i am willing to walk away with nothing to offer ! But i will not beg and she must change at least try to like herself . What the fuck do i do now ? - Posted from rhpmobile Well Big O, you have a Big O Job in front of you. I'll treat this as serious as it sounds.She probably needs professional help but probably won't.She's only got you to help her and if you fuck it up, well you fuck her up.You need to commit something to her and to yourself if you are going to help her.If you intend on doing it half arse or not really sure, time to find the exit now. If you still want to help her, it will be a long haul. But it will be a rewarding journey though if you take your time.You need to give her some serious passion and love. Without any sex for a period of time.She needs to reinvent her sexual side with someone that she is in love with.You need to treat her with warmth, tenderness and like a fragile young virgin although not like a lot of people treat their virgins back in the school years. Lots of companionship, holding hands, kissing, cuddling. Everything except sex. That way, when the time comes, it will be making love. Make her want you. Make her eyes look into yours and beg you to make love to her. Be a real man and say no until the moment is there. Until the moment is right. Can you do that? if you can't then time to exit. And while all that is going on, you get yourself off to a counselor and explain so they might be able to guide you, assuming that she won't go. Good luck Big O Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Ulysses42' Dear Auntie Annie I have been told that my kissing 'sucks ' ..... Im concerned that I am developing a phobia about it ? ... should I take lessons ? Mr Drool Yes, you need lessons. Any volunteers? Did you say drool?.......pass. Perhaps wait for Mango season to arrive again unless you can find some imported ones. Get the nut out of it and practice on that until its pristine. Concentrate on not letting any drool out or drip down the chin. Practice, practise. But be gentle and delicate at the same time. Give it the odd lick as you go while gently sucking on it. Good luck Annie xx
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RHP User
11 years ago
"can i do that? Yes i can . Thankyou very much. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Quoting 'Vanua2' First of all, love your work. Now down to business. I have a problem I need your advice on. I think back to some great times I had, really good times and totally enjoyed what was going on and went to bed totally satisfied, i could almost still taste it the next day. But is what I remember being so good last time going to tick the box again? Or will I be left unsatisfied wishing I made another decision. An opportunity has come up tonight and i need to be sure of what to do, i have eaten at this table before and loved it so will the same decision lead to the same result tonight? Please help, so what do you think, parmesan or mozzarella on the pasta tonight? Confused. - Posted from rhpmobile No confusion here. Parmesan all the way. Keep the mozzarella for the pizza. You have pizza over there? l didn't know you had cheese over there.And don't forget the cracked pepper(if you have it over there) Not sure but I read your username and just makes me wonder what happened to Vanua1??You have cannibals over there? Maybe that's the answer........ good luckAnd stay safe. otherwise we may be talking to Vanua3 soon...... Annie xx
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
How do we achieve world peace? Easiest question yet. Make all religous organisations illegal. Disband all the churches and cults. I said the question was easy. Didn't say the action plan would be...... Good luck with that one.... Annie xx
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MsJonesy
11 years ago
Just a query Aunty Annie. Is it ok if the cream is applied direct by the supplier? I know the delivery can be a bit messy and not that well distributed, but it sure is cool when you get home delivery ;)
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RHP User
11 years ago
Auntie Annie, you gave such a sensible answer! To be honest I was hoping for a solution based on boobs and/or nudity. I shall each my brain for a more challenging supplementary question ;)
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RHP User
11 years ago
I have an exceedingly important event that I will be attending in a couple of weeks and I want to catch the eye of a certain Mr who will be attending. Can you plan an outfit for me? Not just the outfit, can you plan every single detail of my attire including hair style, make up ideas, clothing, accesories, fragrance and underwear? I know that with your amazing mind on the case I'm basically assured to get the guy. All my love, Your biggest fan, ~Kally xo
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RHP User
11 years ago
Her wounds are deep Auntie and the power too love has revealed my next chapter. A drowned emotion yin torn from yang another soul of love driven by deceit to create nothing but hate. The kiss of life The tears of love The kiss of love The tears of life Every tear of every emotion Will leave dry one BigOcean. Truth cannot lie to destroy the soul !! With love we are created . Dear Auntie the force is strong in this one. Today i committed to love , but i had too use deceit to trick and challenge her to return is that ok to cheat like that and make one change there decision ? My lady love returned today wow fuck wow the pain and torment was just so deep in her and tears looked as though they had flowed since she left last time , she is in pain devastated. I was gentle and gave her plenty of space she was so untrusting eyes looked out with hate. Crumbled on my couch pain of torment weeping incoherent ! When i wrote to you today i wrote with tears full down my cheeks emotions overflowing . I cannot do say anything that will help . I ask her if i may read to her something i wrote about her , my question to you auntie i read out loud , just one word i read then i am choked with emotion i cannot read another i wait breath cry tears uncontrollable . I try again and read three words then break down we share tears of pain . I throw my phone in front of her and cry out fuck i cant fucking read it . My tears my truth you cannot fake pure emotion . This was the trigger inside her she sits up grabs my phone and in silence starts to read it . When finished she stands up looks into my eyes my soul open my love falls into my arms and together we embrace tears of pain we share now trust truth shine bright we laugh i hold her tight my love she fills her spirit and with mine we dance talk about life a future we can have we want it lets do it . Auntie as you said i stroke her hair face hold hands my touch soft kiss here and there our lips kiss so politely we seal the deal of our first challenge together powerful is love when two souls want and desire it . Fucking poison Fucking evil in many forms never turn your back for one second . Fuck i did as she is indecisive i say no just sit here just one minute i want to tell you something . But no ok cool i am not going to stop her out the back she steps poison fucking one cigarette is all it took she returns not long after . Somethings wrong what has happened Fuck no fuck no poison has entered and her soul stinks of smoke evil you cunt fuck i have lost her where the fuck is she who the fuck is this poison cold evil her wounds are deep Auntie poison is powerful i have lost her she drives off my love abducted empty . Auntie this one my dear auntie im in for the long hall wish me luck this cunts a doozy . - Posted from rhpmobile
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RHP User
11 years ago
Aunty Annie, I think my bridge partner was having a giggle to herself, when she suggested I join here. I merely mentioned, in passing that I'd like to go the pictures and maybe share a large popcorn with a nice man. Nothing too blue or racy, of course. All I've managed thus far, is to have a few faceless men, ask about the size of my tub, before enquiring when they can give me a piece of their choc top. I'm lactose intolerant! What are my chances of finding a man, who is partial to woollen vests, and isn't allergic to cats? Would it be helpful if I mentioned I am partial to brogues. Brown is so practical. Yours, in waiting. DazedBirdy.xo
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RHP User
11 years ago
I consider myself straight, and I grew up in country WA so anything but is almost considered a felony, but there's this guy at work, ever since I saw him scratch his stomach, you know the motion, where the shirt lifts up just enough to catch an eyeful of the lower abs and oblique, my mind has been wandering, wandering big time. He has this twinkle in his eye when he smiles. I am quite sure he is bi. What do I do? I also do my squats and deadlifts in Converses. Yours, the confused workplace perver. - Posted from rhpmobile
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AnnieWhichway
11 years ago
Awww, no pressure........ I need a think. Get back to you later tonight. Annie xxx
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